For My Brother
by Zandrellia
Summary: The truth behind a brotherly bond and how far it will go.
1. Chapter 1

Obligatory Disclaimer: I clearly do not own any of the characters within (even those who may or may not be originals), any of the settings, concepts, or other potentially copy-written works within this piece. I am merely a vessel; A messenger who conveys a story, nothing more, nothing less.

* * *

He couldn't understand his father. Was his mother not worthy? Was his heart simply big enough for two? Was he somehow missing something which this human woman could give? None of it made sense to Sesshomaru. He doubted it ever would. It wasn't that he judged his father. Sesshomaru knew that wasn't his place, but he simply could not comprehend what this woman meant to him and why she was worth dying for. It went against instinct to take a woman who was not already pack.

Inu were not solitary creatures but did not leave their pack, no matter the reason. His father going to that human woman was nearly the same as abandoning them. Sesshomaru could not understand the desire, the draw, the need to have someone who, as his father put it, _loved_ him. This was a strange sensation, an odd sort of pull that Sesshomaru could not comprehend. What use was _love_? Loyalty was far more important among the inu – and his mother had it in spades. Despite her apparent irritation at being brushed aside as the alpha female for her mate's lustful endeavors, she did nothing to hinder him. She remained as she always did, ever loyal. So why did he push her aside so easily?

Even Sesshomaru had known that someday he would choose a mate based on her best qualities for the pack - strong mothering instincts, intelligence, strength, and above all loyalty – the most enduring quality of the inu. So why would his own father go against such tradition? What exactly was _love_ and what sort of spell had it cast on the great demon?

The answer would never come as his father would succumb to this love so greatly that he would lay his own life down to protect it. His father's last words lingered in his mind. "Do you have something to protect?"

Sesshomaru could not understand such a sentiment. He was not alpha – it was not yet his responsibility to protect. That burden had always been carried by his mother and father, leaving Sesshomaru among the others of their broad pack, to be guided and prepared for the day when he would carry such a load.

That day came earlier than anyone ever had expected as the wailing cries of a newborn infant fell upon the wind, causing something within Sesshomaru to open precariously. Their alpha was dead. Instinct coursed through Sesshomaru's veins and demanded he take action, forced him to accept the responsibility that he was ill prepared for. It was not meant to be this way, but that was how things were and he would not argue against it. Watching the woman leave the burning building with the screaming bundle, Sesshomaru followed.

When he finally approached her, the woman was fearful and clutched her baby to her with an odd sort of ferocity. "This Sesshomaru does not come to harm you. You hold a member of our pack and it is he that we come for."

Izayoi shook her head vigorously, eyes wide with pain and madness. "No! You cannot have him! He... he left me... alone... with this child..." Her head shot up and she glared at Sesshomaru. "He can never know! Never! Just leave us be!"

Sesshomaru raised his eyebrow and stood for a while. Watching the woman whisper to her child, he wondered if this was also part of the crazy insanity that was _love_. It mattered not. This pup was his pack and he would not allow anyone, even his mother, to prevent him from following instincts. "You do not command This Sesshomaru."

The woman sneered, clutching the baby closer to her chest. "You cannot have him! It is bad enough he has already lost a father! I will not abandon him to your kind! I would rather he die than go with you!"

Obviously, she was not thinking clearly, but Sesshomaru knew better than to not take her threats seriously. His eyes widened slightly as his jaw clenched and his aura surrounded him. "You would threaten This Sesshomaru's pack?!"

Izayoi stepped back, gripping the child only to let out a cry as Sesshomaru stepped forward and easily removed the bundle from her clutches. "No!" She cried out. "InuYasha! Please he is all I have!"

Sesshomaru held the stirring pup in his embrace, looking down on the human woman with disgust. He could not understand what his father had ever seen in such a creature. Without even sparing the sobbing woman a glance, he flew off into the night with the first member of his very own pack. When he arrived home, greeted by his mother, she saw what he had done and pursed her lips as she carefully considered her next words.

"Have you thought of the consequences of your actions, Sesshomaru?" Mizuki wondered, following him as he took the pup to his own sleeping chambers, burrowing the tiny infant among the furs that would familiarize the young one with his scent. The mother smiled at that, knowing that her son did not fully understand the motions that instinct drove him towards, but felt a little sorry that this was not his child to claim as such. She knew this would end poorly.

Sesshomaru turned to her, his eyes glinting with determination as he quietly spoke. "This Sesshomaru cares not of the consequences – he is our pack and as such, he will stay with us."

Mizuki's eyes widened at that. "Your pack, you say? You are a hundred years too young for such matters, Sesshomaru." Still, she did not force him to give it up as she watched him curl up with the waking pup whose bright amber eyes showed true the link between the brothers. With a small sigh, she turned away and left them to their bonding, knowing it would be all that her child would have left of his father soon enough.

Things went well for a day or two, but all too soon reality came crashing down on Sesshomaru as he held the screaming pup in his arms and tried to console him. Mizuki entered the room, a wistful smile on her face as she shook her head. "Sesshomaru, this will not work. Let the pup return to his mother."

Sesshomaru stared at his mother with a tired and frustrated gaze, not having received an ounce of rest since he had brought InuYasha home. "She threatened him! She does not deserve him! He is our pack, This Sesshomaru will not abandon him."

Mizuki knelt beside him, reaching up to pet at his head gently as she looked upon him and his tiny 'pack member'. "Sesshomaru, every child seeks their mother. It is instinct. Even a poor mother is better than none. Would you deny InuYasha his instincts for the sake of your own?"

She watched the torn expression on her son's face and knew that, despite his turmoil, he would make the right choice. That forlorn stare would be the last show of emotions Mizuki would ever see upon her child. When Sesshomaru left that night, returning InuYasha to a shocked and crazed Izayoi, his heart would stay with the pup.

Over the years, as Sesshomaru tried to visit InuYasha and instill in him the youkai way – the way of the inu – Izayoi continued to despise youkai and Sesshomaru for trying to take her child away. The human woman never spoke poorly of the great youkai which sired her child, but had nothing positive to say for the rest of his kind or his other son.

When InuYasha uttered his brother's name with a happy laugh, after a promising visit where the elder youkai taught his young pack member how to use his sense of smell to his advantage, Izayoi hit her son for the first time. The next time Sesshomaru would see InuYasha, the young hanyou would utter the words "I hate you" with such anger that the immature alpha would be unable to respond appropriately.

"If that is what you wish, InuYasha." He would leave the pup, but instinct still pushed him to check on him from time to time. When the pup grew old enough, Sesshomaru began to use his own anger to his advantage and started to teach the boy how to defend himself through attacks. As time went on, he watched as the hanyou formed more bonds with humans, only to be betrayed and pinned to a tree under an eternal sleep.

Sesshomaru hissed as he tried to break the barrier, but it was too powerful for him and he did the only thing he could. He protected his pack by protecting the forest. It was a rhythmic thing, eventually feeling more like chore than duty, but one that he would not abandon. He wandered, seeking anything that might help soothe his empty heart. Something that could assist InuYasha in controlling his youkai blood, even though he knew looking for such a thing was foolish as the hanyou had not aged or showed any sign of awareness for many years.

Loyalty was a difficult thing to budge, a strange shackle that one bore with pride. Yet, Sesshomaru felt hollow as his pack remained one who was ever sleeping. Having no alpha and not truly being seen as one left him in an unusual position where he felt as if he might topple over into a strange and frightening darkness.  
Then, one day... light.

A young human woman came into his life once more, or at least she came into InuYasha's. She released the hanyou and the brothers were once again playing their game of cat and mouse. To anyone with sense, Sesshomaru could easily kill the boy, but to anyone without they would never consider that possibility.

Sesshomaru tried to kill the woman-child immediately, realizing that she could be an even greater threat than Izayoi before her, but she endured and InuYasha – foolish brat – claimed her as his own. The shock of such an admission, that this human girl was now a part of the pack, startled the young lord and left him vulnerable to attack. He lost his arm that day, running away to lick his wounds. It was not the physical ones which hurt most.

When Rin, a small human child, came to his aide his emotions tried to tell him to turn her away. His instincts told him that one human was now pack by proxy – why not another? It was so very lonely being so solitary, after all. Yet, he was afraid. Afraid of possibly becoming close only to be betrayed once more. He chose to leave her to her fate, only to find her once again. As he revived the girl he swore that she was not pack. He was just repaying a small debt to her. She was free to do as she pleased.

She chose to follow him and exhibited a greater sign of loyalty than even the most noble of inu had ever displayed. Time and again, she would faithfully entrust him with her happiness and over time Sesshomaru found himself content with this small bandage.

Many things would transpire over the coming months as Sesshomaru continued to keep an eye on InuYasha while caring for Rin, finally feeling closer to his pack than ever before. He was not stupid, of course, realizing that he owed a great deal to the young untrained miko that traveled with InuYasha. Had she not released the hanyou, had she not broken the jewel, had she not remained fiercely loyal to her friends and followed the boy with a pure faith – Sesshomaru would not have his own peace.

It was, therefore, a great surprise when she managed to make the most selfless wish possible and disappeared from their time to wherever she came from. That was not the most shocking thing she did, however, as she returned some time later – as if it were nothing. Was she some kind of witch as well as a miko? Was that even possible? He wondered if InuYasha were in greater danger than he had initially suspected and decided to keep a closer eye on the situation.

Rin was the perfect excuse. He could leave her with the old woman and then visit her frequently, thus he would always know what was happening between InuYasha and this odd young human. What was her name again?

* * *

Kagome gave off a laugh as she was chased by the two children. She toppled over beneath them, letting out a squeal as the kitsune tickled her mercilessly while the young girl caught up to them. Yet, she paused and turned with a wide grin to run from them.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Rin called out, dashing towards her beloved father-like figure but halting at a respectable distance.

Shippo pulled back, giving a nod as he lowered his gaze from the more powerful youkai while his adoptive mother flushed and sat up with a grin. "Lord Sesshomaru, what a pleasant surprise! Rin is always a much more diligent student after your visits." Kagome teased, causing the girl to puff up with pride and make the young miko giggle lightly.

Before Sesshomaru could speak, InuYasha trudged up the hill mumbling something under his breath about stuck-up youkai and their tendency to leave things behind. The lord merely raised his eyebrow at his hanyou sibling's comment, before turning to hand Rin the latest of her gifts.

"Kaede says it's time to eat." InuYasha ground out towards Kagome, clearly aggravated by Sesshomaru's presence.

Rin, oblivious to the irritation that InuYasha felt, smiled at the hanyou pleadingly. "May Lord Sesshomaru come to dinner?" She asked, turning to Kagome with hopeful eyes.

InuYasha was ready to say no, Sesshomaru was ready to relent and agree that it would be a poor decision, but Kagome stood and brushed herself off before giving a nod. "With manners like that, of course he is welcome! Very nice, Rin!"

The girl turned to her guardian with a beaming grin. "Kagome has been teaching me how to ask for things properly! I did well!"

Sesshomaru looked to Kagome and their eyes met briefly, a silent thanks passing and a returning welcome given with a nod. He returned his attention to his ward, who was already going on about all the other things she had recently learned, leaving InuYasha, Kagome, and Shippo to return by themselves. "Your speech has improved greatly, Rin."

With that praise, the child practically dragged him behind her, never touching but trusting he would follow. Of course, he did, he could not understand what mystical power Kagome held over InuYasha and now Rin – but he was determined to get to the bottom of it for the sake of his pack.

The evening meal went by without the usual boisterous chatting Kagome was used to from her friends. Everyone was nervously watching the two half-brothers as irritation clashed with apathy. InuYasha continued to try and bait his elder sibling, making rude comments any chance he could in between Kagome's attempts at civil conversation, only for Sesshomaru to merely glare at the hanyou but do nothing more. Before the meal was finished, both had rushed from the main room to find some field somewhere and attempt to hack off more limbs.

Kagome gave a sigh and after cleaning up and giving the children over to Kaede, searched out the brothers. As she watched them fight, her mind wandered. Would their relationship ever improve? She had strong hope for her own relationship with the hanyou, they were great friends still and seemed to harbor affection for the other, but she knew that he was still lonely. He needed family and Sesshomaru was the only one who could fully fill that gap.

The problem was that they hated each other. Well, no... her eyebrow rose as she thought it over carefully. The real issue was that InuYasha held some serious grudge against Sesshomaru – not that she blamed him entirely. The young lord had not exactly been kind over the last few years; he certainly would not win any brother of the year awards. Still, he did seem to be trying, even if it was for the fact that he had given up on Tessaiga.

Sesshomaru had always claimed to dislike InuYasha because of his human mother, but yet he cared for Rin and didn't seem to harbor a huge hatred for every single human that crossed his path – so what was the real reason?

Her brow furrowed as she thought over their past arguments, attempting to find some missing piece of the puzzle. Part of her doubted there was anything to be found. Her eyes widened when she considered the fact that Sesshomaru rarely, if ever now, instigated their arguments. She turned to watch them carefully, noting how the elder held himself back and did not use his full strength, despite having no reason to do so.

It was then that Kagome decided to get to the bottom of the mystery. Of course, InuYasha would tell her nothing useful. He was only full of frustration and anger when it came to Sesshomaru. When she did question him, he scowled and scratched at his head before turning to her and irritatingly grinding out: "If you're so damn curious, why don't you ask him?

"  
An ingenious idea, but how did one get close to a distant and supposedly human-hating youkai lord without inviting death?

* * *

A blind man would know she was following him.

Kagome was terrible at being stealthy and even worse at keeping her thoughts to herself. For what seemed like the millionth time since his most recent visit, she knocked something else over and gave off a tiny squeal of apology before helping the villager to pick up their things and then running towards him on what he was sure she felt were light feet. Could she be any less graceful?

Sesshomaru fought the urge to slice her in half and enjoy the rest of his day, realizing that he could not do such a thing now that InuYasha had claimed Kagome as his pack and seemed intent on taking the human wench as his mate. Besides, the odds of InuYasha finding a more competent female were rather low, so he'd let the poor hanyou keep the woman, even if she was a nuisance.

He behaved no differently than usual, generally ignoring most humans as he made his way through the village and followed his ward's scent to where she was clearly attempting to complete a task for one much older and taller than she. Rin unsteadily stood on her toes, reaching up to place a large basket on the hook which held it just under the low-hanging eave of the house.

When he took the basket from the child and hung it for her, Kagome gave a gasp and he turned, raising an eyebrow at her odd actions only to see an even stranger reaction on her face. She was thoroughly blushing, as if she'd seen something highly intimate. Sesshomaru turned away from her, following Rin into the small building and thoroughly blocking Kagome's ability to watch him. Inwardly, he couldn't deny the amusement at how her energy flared with her annoyance. His eyes widened slightly as her powers seemed to fumble out, searching for him almost with a child-like persistence.

Sesshomaru decided to push the boundaries of this odd interaction between them by lightly retreating his youki. His curiosity was rewarded with a response from Kagome, he could almost see her startled and alerted gaze as she rushed to the side of the hut and tried to find him once more. The light, pleading way her energy brushed against him sparked something and caused his eyes to widen. It was quite amusing to play this game of cat-and-mouse with her, but he had never known such things to actually tickle. Stomping down the laugh that tried to bubble out of him when she did it again, his face hardened into a frown for a few moments as he pushed out hard. A satisfying smirk flickered on his face as he felt her retreat and heard her give out a startled cry as she stepped back into someone and knock them over. During the scuffle and subsequent apologies, she had forgotten all about him.

It would be several hours later, when he had left the hut with Rin and had concluded his visit with her – while the sun was slowly dipping into the horizon – that she would find him again. This time, however, he was waiting for her. He did not bother with pleasantries, moving right to the point as her footsteps neared. "What do you want?"

Kagome halted and inhaled sharply, her breath hanging in her throat as she considered that. Could she outright tell him what she sought? Would it be that easy?

Just telling him that she was curious to know more about him and why he and InuYasha had such a terrible history would not work. Still, if she didn't then she might never find out. It was better to be honest and let the chips fall where they may. Flushing slightly, she licked her lips and looked up at him. His back was facing her, the pink and orange hues of sunset lingering on his silver hair as they swayed in the breeze. She was slightly grateful for the fact that he could not see her discomfort, not even considering that he would be able to smell it. Bracing herself, she pushed forward. "I was wondering why you seem to love Rin so easily, but yet claim that you dislike humans – yet are not hateful towards any of the humans here, including myself. Additionally, I wonder what happened between you and InuYasha. I thought, if I could get to know you better... perhaps..." She trailed off, wondering if she had said too much.

Sesshomaru blinked placidly, taking a slow breath as he listened to her prattle. So she thought to fix him, did she? Humans, so typical. He shifted his weight to his left foot and turned slightly to the right to face her at an angle, assuring he was still intimidating as he looked down on her. "This Sesshomaru does not see how this has anything to do with you."

The young girl stammered and nodded, her flush deepening. "I know, but... I still want to help." Her eyes hung on his gaze for a few moments before tearing away and darting about, as if seeking something to assist her. Her mind raced as she tried to gather up every bit of courage that she could. "I just don't get why you and InuYasha disagree so much. You're brothers, you should get along!"

He could feel pure annoyance building up behind his eyes and he did his best not to sigh or roll them before turning to look back at the sunset. "You would not understand."

Kagome stilled, feeling as if the wind had been knocked out of her with those words. Her lip trembled before she spoke again, softer, gentler. "I could try."

Why was she so persistent? Why did she insist on bothering him at every turn? His eyes closed and she looked at him, taking in his features and flushing slightly.

Kagome had never really taken in how very beautiful Sesshomaru was. Oh sure, she had noticed that he was pretty before, but had never had the opportunity to actually see it all. It wasn't as if she had ever been given much of a chance to get to know the stoic lord. InuYasha claimed his brother was cruel and would be furious if he found out she was here. Yet, everything she knew of the stiff elder brother was contradictory. When he hadn't responded again, she decided to push her luck and threw out a joke.

"You two didn't fight over some girl, right?" She grinned, wondering how he would take it.

Sesshomaru's eyes widened just slightly and his breath hitched. Fight over some girl? It sounded like a quarrel over a lover, but no... it was still very accurate. The trouble between him and his young pack member amounted to nothing more than a spat over a female. The female in question just happened to be the hanyou's mother. Looking to her stiffly, he noted how she had also froze, her eyes wide with a mix of curiosity and horror. He wondered what she might be thinking. Luckily, he didn't have time to dwell on the strangeness of wondering what human females were contemplating when she opened her mouth.

Kagome struggled to find the words, feeling a sick sensation that was heavy in her stomach. She supposed it was somehow possible, but for some reason the very idea made her nauseated and she felt as if she was ready to cry. It seemed strange, but Kagome felt oddly jealous as she spat out the words, trying to push the conversation forward. "It wasn't Kikyo, was it?"

The way his aura flared and his gaze hardened confused her, and for a brief moment Kagome felt as if the ground below her was giving out. However, when he responded, the absolute irritation in his voice gave way to a peaceful sensation within her that she could not explain. "This Sesshomaru would _never_ fight the hanyou for a lover."

Oh. Kagome gave a broken little laugh. "Of course you wouldn't." She trailed off, feeling foolish as she reached up to tuck her hair behind her ears and darted her eyes to the ground, finding the grass quite fascinating suddenly. She expected the conversation to be over, but for some reason he seemed bothered that she was so irritated, and so he continued.

"It was his mother."

The startling revelation came as the breeze picked up and began to carry the dry leaves that had collected on the ground, rattling them together and snuffing out any further sounds. Kagome felt her heart race as she looked up, only to see that he was no longer there. What did that mean? InuYasha's mother? She couldn't believe that he had loved the woman, with the way he spoke of her it was highly unlikely. Perhaps, he had been jealous? No, that was not entirely accurate either. With a sigh, she resigned herself to waiting for the next opportunity to speak to him.

* * *

As the days grew colder, the leaves slowly falling off the trees to their death and the snow beginning to fall, Kagome began to find that her mind continually turned to the memory of Sesshomaru that autumn evening. They had not spoken since, but she could not help to think of him frequently. Over the weeks, she considered what he had meant.

While she was not the greatest at deducting things, she had come to the conclusion that there was really only one possibility. Izayoi had taken something from Sesshomaru, which left him bitter against her and all humans to come. Kagome could remember her own mother reminding her that when there was hate, there was once love. It was hard to imagine the stoic lord loving the human woman, but perhaps he had been very grateful to her for at least providing something? Like a brother?

"Child, ye have dropped another one. Are ye unwell?" Kaede's voice broke through her hazy thoughts and drew her attention to the fact that her legs were now soaked with the water she'd been bringing to the house.

Kagome's eyes widened and she let out a sigh, handing the half-filled bucket to the older miko before excusing herself. This was the third time this week she had done this. Her mind was so distracted, so full of Sesshomaru and wondering why he had become the way he did and what he meant by what he said that she could barely function. Most of the villagers attributed it to her getting used to living with them, to them Kagome came from a strange place with odd customs. Perhaps it was entirely normal where she came from to daydream and dump water on yourself. Still, Kaede knew the girl the best and had seen this before in her elder sister.

Kagome was in love.

The elder woman's face contorted into a frown as she thought it over. It was very obvious that the girl was very badly in love, but it was very unfortunate how fate drew two individuals together and apart so easily. Her eye shifted towards where InuYasha was chopping wood and giving a show to some of the village children, letting out a sad sigh as Kagome walked right past him... oblivious. At once, the girl stilled, just on the outskirts of the village, and Kaede watched with a mixture of amusement and horror as the young woman took up the bottom of her drenched kimono and broke into a run towards the well. It was not until Rin also darted out from inside the hut and ran in the same direction with a squeal that realization set in. This was worse than she had thought.

When Kagome felt his aura pushing against hers, she stilled, her breath hitching in her throat as she tried to ignore the butterflies that fluttered in her stomach. Now was her chance for answers! Rushing towards the well, Kagome was ready to confront Sesshomaru, but halfway there she felt another energy tickling from behind and she skidded to a halt, darting into the trees and leaning against one as her chest heaved. Watching the young girl run towards her father-like figure, Kagome suddenly felt the weight of her emotions crush down on her. What had she been doing? What had she expected?

Trembling, she remained where she was as the day began to cool and the snow started to fall. Despite the fact that she was wet and her teeth were now chattering loudly, Kagome felt hot. Her dull nails dug into the bark of the tree behind her as she leaned back, closing her eyes and allowing the cool snowflakes to fall upon her lashes. When he spoke, that soothing cold would lance down through her body and pool into warmth within her abdomen, causing her to gasp.

"You will die if you remain out here."

She nodded stiffly, feeling tears well in her eyes at the very notion that he was remotely concerned for her well-being. Her throat was filled with cotton as she tried to speak, the cold of her skin and the heavy warmth pooling within her mixing to cause her to tremble visibly. "Sesshomaru..."

He did not respond, but inwardly he was surprised and curious. She had dropped the formalities and was speaking to him intimately? While many humans were foolish and often stupid, this particular female had proven she was not typically so. Why the change? He chose to ignore the way his heart sped up at how his name fell from her lips. He realized that he had thought of her far too much during his absence, which only caused him to stay away for longer. They were getting too close. He would have to tell her everything in order to satisfy her curiosity and then leave her to InuYasha. This was how it should be.

"Sesshomaru..." The sad look in her eyes as she gazed into his sent a chill down his spine; luckily she did not seem to notice. "What did she do to you?"

Seconds dragged on as he found it difficult to breathe. He had spent so long within the lie that for quite some time he almost believed it, too. No other had ever seen the truth, had ever known the honest pain that he suffered. They all believed that he hated InuYasha for his human heritage and, in some ways, that was true – but it was not because he had hated humans before. They had always been an enigma to him, always confusing and contradicting, always so full of life in their short lifespans. Sesshomaru had wondered why they even bothered. He had honestly not thought on them much until his father fell in love with a human woman. _Love_, still such a strange concept to him that he could not even know that he was falling for its traps this very moment as he looked upon the shivering female in the snow.

In the distance a bird cried, breaking the spell that had cast about them, and he finally spoke. "She gave this Sesshomaru pack... and took it away."

Tears fell from Kagome's face as her heart filled with those words. Pack, she had learned through the years, was a word many youkai used that was somewhat synonymous with the human family. Yet, unlike families, packs never parted unless the situation was dire. In this case, it seemed that when the great dog general died saving Izayoi and InuYasha, a young Sesshomaru followed instinct and took his brother as his own, declaring him pack. Being human, however, Kagome also understood the bond between a mother and child. Izayoi was unlikely to be able to function without her baby, particularly after the death of her lover. It was all so very sad.

Sesshomaru and Izayoi had come to despise each other, to be mortal enemies, because they both wanted to love the same individual.

"Are all your questions answered?" He queried, unable to stand here much longer. Instinct told him that she, too, was pack by way of InuYasha, and he was struggling against the desire to pull her towards him and warm her clearly frozen body.

Kagome stared at him for a while, the tears slowly trailing down her face as she felt the emotions that had been slowly building well up inside her. Before she could convince herself to do otherwise, she threw herself at him, arms flying around him as she embraced his stiff torso.

Sesshomaru's eyes rounded as he stilled within her grasp, his breath hitching in his throat as he tried to focus on what she was doing. This was wrong. Kagome belonged to InuYasha, his pack. To hold her and give her false hope now would be the same as betraying his sibling, and he would not do that. Gently, he grasped her shoulders and pushed her away, holding her at arm's length and looking down at her tear stained face. "This cannot happen."

She wanted to ask why not, to question his judgment, to push for what her heart was telling her, but she could do none of that as he was gone before she could even finish taking in a breath. Her heart shattered as she fell to her knees in the snow, not even caring that it was only making her colder. It was in that moment that Kagome realized the horrible truth. She had fallen in love with Sesshomaru.

Worse, he would refuse her at every turn because of pack loyalty and because of his fear of relationships. Not that she could blame him. Nearly every relationship he formed hurt him in some way. His father abandoned him for Izayoi and InuYasha. Izayoi betrayed him by taking InuYasha from him. InuYasha... his ignorance hurt Sesshomaru with every day that he continued to hate the elder sibling.

It wasn't as if Sesshomaru was without fault in this. He instigated the anger and distrust that InuYasha felt. Yet, Kagome had noticed that Sesshomaru rarely initiated any arguments or sparring between them now. She had to wonder if it had all been for InuYasha's sake, which only made her heart break even greater.

Slowly, Kagome stood and brushed herself off, not really noticing how very disheveled she was as she stumbled through the snow and towards the village. The closer she became, the clearer a pair of voices became.

"Lord Sesshomaru! Your honorable mother is expecting you, is it wise to keep her waiting?" Jaken questioned, bracing himself to be kicked but knowing he could expect worse from his master's mother.

Sesshomaru stilled, noting that Kagome's scent – while muted from all the snow – was nearby. He did not want her involved in this, but it seemed he might have no choice if she was going to be insistent. Turning towards her, he spoke without looking at her. "This Sesshomaru understands our mother's request and is in the process of obtaining Rin for a plan to get out of the agreements our mother has arranged."

Jaken seemed confused that his master was discussing his thoughts with him, but replied nonetheless. "If you do not marry your betrothed, Lord Sesshomaru, it would end badly for the relations between the northern and western pack."

The usually stoic inu gave out a frustrated sigh, brow furrowing. "This Sesshomaru does not wish to marry the princess of the northern pack. To mate her would require remaining in the north, which cannot happen."

Kagome's brow furrowed. So he meant to ask Rin to help him? "How?" Her eyes widened in surprise, as she hadn't really expected to voice her thoughts aloud.  
Sesshomaru did not mind, used to her outbursts and responding. "Rin will pose as our lover. It is well known that This Sesshomaru has cared for Rin since she was a child, so it will not be impossible to believe. If This Sesshomaru can convince the pack that we have already found a mate, the betrothal can be called off without spoiling relations between the packs."

The miko seemed surprised at this. Did the inu really place such value on love? She considered his plan, but frowned. "You shouldn't ask Rin this." He was already walking towards the village once more, as if to say her opinion was unimportant on the matter. She sighed and raced to catch up with his with long strides. "You know this is wrong! If you were so certain you would have already asked her instead of putting it off until the last minute!" He stilled but she did not back down, knowing it was too late for that. "You'll give her the wrong idea. She already cares for you too much. Do you want to hurt her?"

Silence filled the forest, only occasionally broken by Jaken's mumbling under his breath about insolent human women. When Sesshomaru finally spoke, Kagome nearly jumped. "Do you have another suggestion?" It was less a request and more mocking than anything. He was teasing her.

Her mind raced. Did she have another idea? She did care for him greatly and she did want to help him, even if it meant that she might hurt her friend. Friend... with a sigh, she inwardly admitted that InuYasha no longer held the highest place in her heart. It wasn't that she no longer trusted him, but that her heart had changed.

Looking down at her semi frozen hands, Kagome answered firmly but softly. "Take me instead."


	2. Chapter 2

It was perfectly illogical to take her in place of Rin. Part of the plot was the fact that many youkai had seen him with Rin, including his mother, and would not doubt that he was sincere. In fact, rumors had long been spread about him and his daughter-like ward. While those suggestions disgusted him to no end, he could not risk losing his pack, which included her, for the sake of her pride amid the youkai. She was human, so she had no need to save face among his kind. He had no intention of remaining under the rule of his mother, having gone down this path long ago. This was merely to break ties cleanly and allow his mother to keep her dignity intact.

Kagome would be a poor choice in this farce. She lacked the ability to follow commands that Rin had. Worse, she was clearly very attached to InuYasha _and_ a miko. Admitting to anyone that he might harbor the slightest of emotion for her would be like cutting his legs off and crying out for death. There was just one major flaw with all this: She was right. By asking Rin, who would not deny him, he would be giving the young girl a sense of possibility, a hope that she would likely cling to until her death - a death that would then be alone, barren, and empty. He did not wish for such things for her, did not waste his time and effort to bring her soul back to the living only for it to rot away uselessly in her decaying body. By saving her, protecting her, he would be damning her.

Closing his eyes tightly, he turned away without a word, slowly walking into the forest and away from the village. Surprisingly, Kagome followed obediently, not saying a word as her teeth chattered in the chilly air and her toes froze beneath her wet socks. Sesshomaru paused and frowned. "Stay here." He ordered, leaving her with Jaken, who seemed lost on what exactly was happening between his master and the miko.

When he returned, he handed her a parcel and then gestured to Jaken as they continued walking along the snowy hillside. After a few minutes, Kagome finally realized where they were headed and smiled gently, feeling grateful and warm for his consideration. A hot spring. A place where she could bathe and warm at once. Sesshomaru and Jaken left her there, retreating somewhere, and Kagome opened the cloth package to glance inside. Traditional clothes, of course, she couldn't expect much less from him. Atop the clothes rested a cake of soap, a comb, and a simple pewter hair piece with no real decorative touches to it. The kimono was layered, to keep her warm, and beneath that was a heavy cloak.

Once she was washed and had dressed in the kimono, mostly, she stood at the bank of the hot spring and grumbled with irritation. When he spoke, she nearly slipped and fell into the water, eyes going wide as his hand rested against her back, holding her upright. "Do you require assistance?"

Kagome wasn't sure her eyes could get any wider. Her face probably couldn't get much warmer, and she was so very glad that the hot spring was steaming from the snow, as that hid her flushed appearance nicely. Sheepishly, she held out the ends of the obi he had brought her. "I don't know how to wear kimono."

Sesshomaru frowned, wondering if she lacked education. She had always seemed intelligent. Any respectable young woman would at least know how to tie an obi. Perhaps that was why she always wore those ridiculously short and odd clothes or simply tied light kimono closed with a tacky knot. That wouldn't do. He would have to educate her. If she was going to pass for his lover, she would need to be knowledgeable of the basics, at the very least.

After assuring she was stable, he lifted the ends of the obi in his hands, tucking and tightening where it was necessary. Kagome froze, her heart racing as soon as his fingertips brushed against hers, when he reached into her sleeves, however, tugging on something and pulling the whole outfit together, the magical spell that had been cast on her was broken and she let out a squeal of surprise. "Hey! Aren't you being a little too friendly?" She managed to grind out, doing her best to hide her attraction and humiliation with frustration and anger.

He didn't allow her the luxury, pulling her small waist towards him and pressing her against his front, armor digging into her back as he leaned in to whisper into her ear. "My dear, This Sesshomaru must convince them we are far more friendly than this. Unless, you'd prefer that we just get things over with and This Sesshomaru take you here in the hot spring."

Kagome let out a whimper as her body and mind clashed with each other. She wanted to ask a million questions, to yell and scream and put on her typical facade. It was comfortable, her act, to pretend as if she were angry in place of what she really wanted. It was easier than accepting that she would never get what she desired. Yet, she could not help the near whisper that escaped her lips as her breath hung warm and heavy in the chilly air. "Do you want to?"

Both went quiet and still for some time, his claws digging into the padding of her kimono dangerously before he knelt down and took up the heavy cloak, draping it over her. It was a mistake, as the slightly angled hood and the long draping cloth only served to make her appear even more delicate, combined with her small stature and the pale red, purple, and blue of the kimono, she was quite alluring. Sesshomaru bit the inside of his lip and pushed forward, not waiting for her as she gathered her things and followed the tracks he left in the snow. When she finally caught up with him, their tension was broken and she had greater concerns on her mind.

"Where are we going?"

He swallowed down the lump that had now formed an odd and thick sensation in his throat before responding. "Hokkaido."

Kagome blinked, stopping mid-step as her eyes widened. "Are we _walking_ the entire way?"

Sesshomaru felt the desire to sigh build within him. "Of course we are walking most of the way. This Sesshomaru cannot expend that kind of energy just to rush there, additionally; the time it will take will give us what we need to..." He trailed off, suddenly finding he was actually nervous. Sesshomaru continued to stomp through the snow, ignoring the sensation. It wasn't that he had never liked someone. Okay, it was exactly that. He had taken on his own pack at a young age for youkai. Even his present age would be considered somewhat young. Right now, by youkai standards, he should barely be gaining a mate and she would be the first of his pack. Yet, when InuYasha was born and abandoned by their father, leaving him with no other to care for him, his instincts had taken root and he claimed the boy as his own.

It was not a secret amid the youkai courts that the young son of the great inu general had essentially done everything backwards. He gained a pack member at a young age, acquired a daughter long before a mate, and had thus never shown any interest in females. His instinct to reproduce should have been driven long before his desire to form a pack ever had the chance to bear fruit. Because his mind had, to put it lightly, skipped that step – Sesshomaru had never really considered females.

His eyes tightened as a north wind blew hard on them, pushing down through the trees. It was not the wind he struggled against, however, but the desire to turn and guard her as she gasped and hid beneath the thick layers of pink cloth he'd given her. He supposed it was only natural that he would find her attractive before any other. She had, basically, been admitted to his pack long before any other female. Typically, the first female in the pack belonged to the alpha male. Yet, she did not belong to him – he continually reminded himself as he did his best to ignore her struggling. It wasn't that he was totally heartless, although he was sure that he had given her such an impression, but that he knew the moment he began to care for her in any more than a very distant manner it would be difficult for him to pull back. No, it was better for them both if he remained careful and did not become too close to her. It would be difficult enough when they reached Hokkaido. Knowing that he would have to pose as her lover, only to give her over to InuYasha, was actually quite painful.

Inu did not have many lovers like humans did. They could have multiple partners, but typically it was when both mates were attracted to the other party. Often, a strong alpha would allow another alpha to bed his mate, assuring the pack strength, while they worked side-by-side to protect their kin. The female would be agreeable to this, as she would gain greater odds in having strong offspring. Additionally, if a male died and left his mate alone, it often fell to the brother or brother-in-law to take on the mate in order to protect her and her pups to assure they did not perish. His uncle had done such a thing when his father passed, taking his mother as a secondary mate to protect the pack. This allowed her to keep her status while giving him more power.

Kagome's sigh, followed by an angry insistent whine caused him to pause and turn to notice that she was quite a distance behind him. "There is no way I can _walk_ all the way to Hokkaido! It would take me at least two weeks!" With a frustrated yell, she kicked at the tree beside her and hit it with her wooden sandals before toppling over and falling into the snow. "Why did you buy me these ridiculous shoes anyway? They're horrible for snow! They're just going to make it take longer!"

She pouted, readying herself for more yelling when she noted that he hadn't responded. Had he left her behind? Part of her kind of hoped he would. The silence between them was killing her and causing her to think over how strange things had become - far more than she liked. Looking up, she expected to see him walking away from her, but instead she saw his hand there before her face, waiting for her. A faint flush crept onto her cheeks as she placed her hand in his and he lifted her from the ground almost effortlessly.

His brow furrowed as he held her up, not taking note of the fact that she had become very quiet. "Your hand is freezing. Do these clothes not keep you warm?"  
She nodded slightly, tugging as she tried to pull her hand from his. When he did not relent, she did what she always did during awkward situations. Opened her mouth and said something totally irrelevant. "Why did you try to kill me?"

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at that. He only lifted her from the snow just now. Was she delusional as well? "This Sesshomaru has no idea what you mean." He replied, taking up her other hand and rubbing them between his own as his amber gaze focused on the nearly frozen digits. Really, he had no idea that humans were _this_ delicate. Was it unique to Kagome or had Rin been as well and he had simply ignored it all this time?

"I mean in your father's tomb." She said, her voice cracking at how intently he was trying to warm her hands and how she was trying not to care and failing miserably.

Ah. That time, of course... he had forgotten. Why did he try to kill her? Oh, right. That. He didn't really want to admit that to _anyone_, least of all her, but it was probably too late for that now. He was already in this deep with her, and she was to pose as his lover, so it would be better if he divulged _some_ secrets. "This Sesshomaru was jealous."

He didn't look at her when he said those words, and the way he said them so casually almost hinted that he might be toying with her, but Kagome knew better. Jealous… of her? Why? Her mind was so wrapped up in trying to figure out why he might be jealous of her, that she completely forgot that he was holding her hands, rubbing them in an attempt to warm them. At this point, instinct had taken over and his desire to protect her was far greater than any wish to not hurt his brother any more than he already had. By the time she realized he was still warming her hands, they were almost burning with a stinging pain. "That hurts."  
At once, both stilled, eyes meeting as the tension between them grew once more. She could feel the warmth of his breath against her face as he stared down on her, hands still within his.

"Lord Sesshomaru, if we do not hurry, your mother will be displeased! She is already expecting you!"

Closing his eyes slowly and dropping Kagome's hands, Sesshomaru was suddenly grateful for the annoying toad, turning from her and continuing on. Kagome remained where she was for some time, realizing that she would be forced to follow him on foot for as long as he desired to walk. For a while, she considered turning away and going home, demanding that he treat her well, but knew that would only hinder what progress they had made. Instead, she remained where she was, holding the pale cloth around her like a cocoon and staring at the snow falling placidly.

Minutes went by before he realized she was not following them and returned to her with irritation. She stared at him, not bothering to display her frustration at his lack of understanding; instead she waited for the inevitable meltdown that was sure to come. "What is taking you so long?"

Kagome took a slow breath and looked at him firmly. "I am doing a favor for you, the least you could do is respect the fact that I am merely a human woman and cannot walk this distance within a short time period. I also require rest every evening and at least two meals a day – three would be preferable, but I do not expect such generosity from you – I also will require stopping frequently to relieve myself. I'm not getting a bladder infection just because you want to get out of an arrangement by lying to your mother."

He frowned slightly at this and Jaken took a step back with a wary sound. She had insulted his ability to provide for her. InuYasha and the world be damned. He would not stand idly by and allow her to act this way. Instinct roared within him to prove himself and without a word to her he turned away in a flurry of youki, leaving her within the snowfall with Jaken by her side. Kagome did not move, her stubborn nature willing her to remain where she was and waiting. It was hard to tell how long had gone by but she guessed it was somewhere within the range of about an hour when she felt his frustrated energy forcefully push against hers before something dropped from the sky and landed within inches from her.

Letting out a started scream, Kagome fell back into the snow, staring wide-eyed at the large and dead brown bear that nearly crushed her. Her lip trembled as she stared at it, heart racing. What the hell? Was he trying to murder her by dropping bears on her? Couldn't he just be nice and kill her with his own two hands? Was that too much to ask for? When she looked up to see him, he was floating above the bear, a satisfied glint in his eyes as he flicked his claws, flinging blood onto the once pristine snow beside her.

"You were saying?"

Kagome felt sick. She pointed at the bear, mouth flopping up and down before she finally responded. "I can't eat that!"

His expression went from victorious to anger as she pulled the rug out from under him. What did she mean she couldn't eat it? Was it not large enough, meaty enough, and warm enough? What was the problem? Kagome's disgusted and horrified expression only fueled his irritation. Reaching down, he slit the belly of the large beast open and cut out a piece before looking at her intently and stuffing it into her mouth. Her eyes widened as the blood drizzled off his fingers before trailing down her chin and dripping on her clothing. Tears welled in her eyes as he removed his fingers, leaving the meat within her mouth. The absolutely terrifying look of fury on his face told her that she should eat it, but as she tried to chew it, the sensation of the raw meat along with the very gamey taste only served to churn her empty stomach more. At the fourth bite, she could take no more and leaned forward to regurgitate it into her waiting palms.

"I can't!" The tears trailed down her face as she held onto the bloody meat, hoping he wouldn't force her to consume it. It was so disgusting. Right now, she had entirely lost her appetite and really didn't mind going without anymore.

Sesshomaru didn't care what she wanted now. He had to prove her wrong, to show that he could provide and that she was a total idiot for ever doubting it. It had nothing to do with her comfort or if he desired her. He would have behaved this way if any female had acted the way she had, the fact that she was a part of his pack only added insult to injury. Reaching down, he cut out another piece of meat, this one cooled from the early winter air, and reached for her face.

When he met with resistance, her jaw firmly closed as she shook her head, he reached out and grasped her lower lip, pulling on it until she relented from fear of losing her flesh. As soon as her mouth was opened, already crying out her dissatisfaction at his actions, he stuffed the meat into her mouth and forced her jaw shut. "Chew." He commanded.

Kagome did as she was told, chewing the meat a couple times and trying not to feel sick. In her mind all she could do was cry a mantra hoping he wouldn't force her to swallow it. His hand was warm against her face, keeping her mouth closed, and she obediently chewed the meat, feeling more depressed about eating than she ever had in her entire life. When his gaze narrowed on her, she drew back, trying not to endure any more than she already had to. Kneeling in the snow before her, he reached around; bringing her head close and ignoring how he was getting bear blood all over her cleaned and nicely coiffed hair. With a hand on either side of her head, he said the word she had been dreading. "Swallow."

Closing her eyes tightly, she let out a sob as she did what she was told, forcing the meat down her throat and shuddering as it traveled down. She wanted to be furious at him, to yell and scream and throw things. Yet, when his expression shifted from one of anger and persistence to one of satisfied victory, eyes lighting up at the idea that he had provided for her a meal – even if it wasn't what she wanted to eat – she couldn't help but feel anything but happy. Riding on his emotions as he released her mouth, she leaned into embrace him, surprising them both. "Never do that again." She declared. "I don't enjoy raw meat. It makes my stomach lurch. Also, it can be highly toxic to humans and can kill us."

Sesshomaru felt as if someone had knocked all the wind out of him. There she went, dashing his success against her humanity. Their proximity, like a splash of cold water on his face, only further served to wake him from his instinctual acts and he pushed away from her, standing and drawing on years of practice to form a stoic façade again. "If you wish to cook the meat, Jaken can prepare a fire for you." With that statement, he left her once more and - while he wouldn't admit it to anyone – ran away.

Kagome watched him go, startled and feeling more than a little mollified. She probably should have explained why she couldn't eat the bear before things had gone out of hand. Turning to Jaken, she noticed how the toad was staring at her intently, as if it knew she was up to some grand scheme. He probably thought she had intentions of causing trouble for his master, but she really didn't. She wanted to help, just not die in the process! With a sigh, she set about trying to get him to cooperate in helping her help them.

* * *

Meanwhile, InuYasha was sulking. After chopping wood for the villagers, he had returned expecting to find a nice warm meal and a pretty smiling Kagome, but had found neither. It had been the younger miko's turn to cook dinner that night, but Kaede explained that she hadn't returned and so she and Rin were trying to prepare something last minute. He had attempted to go searching for the girl, but couldn't find her anywhere. Worse, it was starting to snow heavily and so her scent was cold. There was no way he would be able to scent her in this!

So here he was, pouting like a child. Kaede let out a sigh at the fortieth time the hanyou had grumbled under his breath about ungrateful wenches and turned to pin him down with an even stare. She was fairly certain the girl had gone somewhere with Lord Sesshomaru, although where was entirely unknown to her. Still, there was no reason to think that he would harm the girl, so that only left her to deal with the boy. What he needed was a task, something to keep him busy. "InuYasha, go hunt some meat for the meal."

He rolled his eyes, griping as he stood and brushed himself off, but did exactly what she demanded of him and went out into the snow, sniffing the area. Hunting was much more difficult during the snow, but it wasn't impossible if the scent was fresh. After some time, he latched onto a scent… bear? Wouldn't a bear be hibernating by now? He frowned and followed the smell only to pause at the added fragrance of burning wood and meat cooking over a fire.

Carefully, he walked towards the fire, noting that there were only two individuals. One was the annoying toad that always followed his brother everywhere. The other was… a human woman? Her scent was confusing, muted and mixed with the scent of the bear. She, however, recognized his energy as it brushed against hers and stiffened.

Kagome licked her lips, turning to look at the familiar hanyou who she had loved so dearly, not that she didn't still love him very much, but the past few weeks had taught her that her heart was changing, shifting away from him. It wasn't his fault, but that only proved to make her feel even guiltier. "InuYasha?"

The hanyou froze and his eyes widened as he looked to see Kagome, standing there in the snow, dressed in a fine kimono, hair done up with a fancy comb and pin. None of that startled him more than the fact that she had blood crusted to her face and mouth… and some on her clothes. His brow furrowed and he rushed towards her, pulling her towards him and sniffing at her chin before letting out a relieved sigh. Bear blood. It wasn't hers.

The girl squeaked and shoved against him, rolling her eyes and waving the small blade Jaken had given her for her task in her hand as she yelled at the boy. "Hey! Personal space, okay?! You could have _asked_ before smelling me, at least!"

InuYasha ignored her outbursts, taking everything in. She was preparing the bear as if she was going on a long journey, smoking the meat under a contraption she had built over the fire. Jaken was here with her as if it was normal, and she was dressed in a fine kimono… one she wouldn't have been able to put on without help. His face slowly fell into a frown as he turned to look at her once more. "What is going on, Kagome?"

She sighed and crossed her arms, letting out a huff. "It's really none of your business, InuYasha!"

He frowned at that. What did she mean by none of his business? Gripping her by the elbow, he turned her around to glare down at her. "Do you know how worried I was? What are you doing?!"

Kagome let out another sigh, deflating as she realized that she probably had worried a few people. The decision to leave had been sudden. "I have something I need to do. Let me go, I'll see you later."

InuYasha growled low as he felt his elder sibling's presence draw closer. Tugging Kagome towards him, he shoved her behind him, causing her to tumble over due to the tight nature of the kimono. She let out a scream, face-planting in the snow and struggling to get up but slipping on the slick surface of the moist earth. "Sesshomaru! What are you doing here?" InuYasha yelled, oblivious to Kagome's suffering.

Sesshomaru watched the scene between them, inwardly fighting against his desire to teach his young pack member a lesson and the desire to protect Kagome. Unfortunately, she had long ago expressed her affection for the hanyou, and it had been assumed by many that they intended to stay together, so he could not entirely go against InuYasha's treatment of her. If he did it would practically be like laying claim to her himself, something he was unwilling to do. He had formed unusual feelings in regards to the miko, but had no intention of seeing them through.

She belonged to InuYasha, which was very clear. Still, he did require her assistance. It was too late to change females at this point. She knew the plan, was dressed and ready to go with him. He would rather not endure the inconvenience of having to return her just yet. Unable to fight InuYasha for the female, he was left with little option but to bargain with the hanyou. "This Sesshomaru requires the assistance of your miko for a short period."

Kagome squeaked as she slipped and fell into the snow once more, but managed to grumble out. "You don't need his permission!"

Sesshomaru didn't feel the same. Really, taking her like this had been a poor move on his part, he realized that now. Looking InuYasha square in the eyes, he said the words that he knew the hanyou required. "She will be returned to you, unharmed."

At this point, InuYasha was confused. What could he possibly need Kagome's help with? Maybe he had to find a miko, and had settled on her as she was the one most likely to cooperate with him? It seemed plausible. Still, he didn't really want to help Sesshomaru. He had probably forced Kagome to go along with this plan.

"Keh. Find someone else to help you! Kagome ain't going anywhere!"

The elder youkai's eyes widened slightly, but he knew better than to argue this point. If he pushed for her presence, he would be responsible for her. That could not happen. InuYasha had suffered far too much at his hand through his young life; he owed it as alpha of their pack to honor his claim on the woman. He turned away, gesturing to Jaken to follow, and began to trudge through the snow as he tried to collect his thoughts and emotions. He felt conflicted. Pack instinct told him he should allow InuYasha the right to veto the plan, Kagome belonged to him, after all. Yet, another instinct, one that hadn't been awake until recently, gnawed at his heart and told him to go back for her. No. He would not be weak. She belonged to another and he would leave her there.

Kagome finally managed to stand, brushing the snow off her kimono and turning to see Sesshomaru leaving. She took a step forward, wanting to run towards him and tell him this was all a misunderstanding, but InuYasha grasped her hand. "Come on." He demanded, tugging at her as he turned the opposite direction, towards the village.

Her eyes widened and she pulled against him. "No!" She cried out, her pulse racing as she tried to make sense of all of this. Who was InuYasha to order her around like this? Who was anyone? She was her own person, right? She could go where she liked! It wasn't as if she and InuYasha had married. They hadn't even kissed more than a couple times! Anger and frustration grew in her, and she pulled back, falling to her knees in the snow against his persistent pulling. Raising her head back, her eyes full of fury; she let out a scream into the woods. "Let me go, InuYasha! I… I… I belong to no one!"

Both brothers stilled.

InuYasha turned to look down on her like she had gone crazy, he was sure she had. "Are you nuts? No one said anything about owning you! Just get up and come home!"

Kagome shook her head vehemently, strands of her hair falling loose and tumbling around her face as she did so. "No! I don't want to and you can't make me!"

The hanyou smirked, knowing that she was just being difficult, and raised an eyebrow at that. "Wanna bet?"

She gasped as he lifted her inches above the ground, ready to toss her over his shoulder, a searing pain rushing through her shoulder as she dangled above the ground in his grip. Here she was, trying to fight for her rights as an individual, and he was going to cart her home like a sack of potatoes! Wincing, she tried to fight him, but knew that if she struggled too much her shoulder might dislocate. Her mind raced, wondering how things had become so crazy. InuYasha had always been crude and rather disrespectful of her needs and wishes, but he'd never been overly physical. Why now?

"She wishes to be released, InuYasha." Sesshomaru's firm voice broke through the silence, and Kagome's eyes shot open to see him standing between her and his sibling, facing the hanyou.

InuYasha scowled. "What's it to you?"

"Let her go, InuYasha." The elder commanded, his hand coming up to grip his half-brother's wrist. "Or This Sesshomaru will make you."

Kagome and InuYasha's eyes widened, and she gasped as he growled low, but he released her. She crumpled to the ground with a cry, bringing her hand up to rub at her abused shoulder. The hanyou shook his head and stared down at her, amber gaze filled with confusion and pain. He blamed her. She knew that. Without his usual frantic fit, InuYasha took one last hateful glance between the two and left them there. After his scent was long gone from the area, Sesshomaru finally turned to look down on a trembling Kagome. Her eyes were wide with fear as she tried to fight back the tears that welled in her eyes.

For a few moments, he wondered if he had done something wrong. She had said she didn't belong to anyone and that she didn't want to go with him, which – as far as he was concerned – was all he needed to hear in order to stop his half-brother from forcefully taking her back. She was here of her own will and he was not going to deny her that right. So why did she seem so upset? Had he misinterpreted her words? Was she not sincere? He couldn't help but damn human women and their complexities. It was so hard to tell sane ones from crazy ones. "Miko," he broached, "we must depart soon. You need to finish preparing the bear meat."

At once, she sniffed and reached up to wipe at her eyes with her sleeve, nodding as she attempted to stand. He held out his hand for her once more, lifting her with ease and ignoring the nagging voice in his head that told him she did _not_ belong to his brother and therefore, as alpha, she belonged to _him_. It would do no one any good for him to think that way, no matter what instincts told him. Her behavior would imply that she harbored strong emotions for InuYasha and from what he knew of humans, which granted was limited, they preferred to choose matches based on _love_. Besides, she was not the best choice for him anyway.

Although she had proven herself quite strong in the battle against Naraku, clever and determined in her choice of wish to rid the world of the Shikon, and even mothering in her interactions with children – he had yet to see the greatest quality in an inu mate come from her: loyalty. She had returned to the past to be with InuYasha, which was true, but had quickly turned from him based on her earlier actions. More damning than anything, he could not overcome the burdensome image of her turning against him like Izayoi had whenever she might have offspring. Regardless if she had them with him or his brother, they would still be part of _his_ pack – and therefore, his responsibility to train in the ways of youkai. He would not allow another mistake like InuYasha to occur. It was better if she was compliant. The best way to assure that was to let her choose based on this notion of _love_. Since it came down to that, Sesshomaru was absolutely certain that these misplaced ideas floating around in his mind and the odd tension that seemed to grow between them would not amount to anything fruitful – she would not love him and he certainly could not love her.

"Sesshomaru?"

Her gentle voice startled him out of his thoughts, and he inwardly scolded himself for getting caught up on this ridiculous subject once more. Perhaps he _should_ mate the princess of the Northern pack. That would settle his instincts quickly and he wouldn't have to bear this nonsense anymore. He raised an eyebrow at her questioning look, wondering what she wanted. "Hn." He replied, not sure what to say but not wanting to lower himself as to ask her what she had to say.  
She flushed nicely in the moonlight, the orange hues of the fire bouncing off her rosy cheeks and drawing his gaze to how enticing she looked with her hair out of sorts like that. Licking her lips, she shifted on her feet before speaking. "May I have my hand back?"

As if he had been struck by lightning, Sesshomaru's eyes widened slightly and he released her hand like it was a hot stone. She laughed nervously and brought her hand to her chest, covering it with her other hand before giving a slight bow of thanks and turning away to continue to her task. He watched her as she carved the bear up neatly, trying not to waste anything but also working hard at not getting her clothes dirty. She had done a fine job, since all that had stained her kimono were the small spots that were his doing. Still, he would need to provide her with another one before they reached their destination.

Watching her, his mind was ready to wander to dangerous thoughts when she shattered the nervous silence. "So why were you jealous?" Her voice didn't betray any hint of anger, not even curiosity, just simple questioning for the sake of talking. She apparently wanted a distraction.

He was all too happy to give her one, but this subject was one he was not pleased with admitting fully. Sesshomaru was no coward, but the idea that anyone could make him feel jealousy was frightening. How could he explain to her, a mere human, that he was terrified of the fact that she represented a powerful force in InuYasha's life? It was a hard pill to swallow as it was, but to try and explain it to her was even more difficult. Telling her the truth would give her power over him, a power he wasn't certain he wished her to have - almost positive that he didn't. Yet, he found himself telling her nonetheless, her innocent query pulling the words from him before he knew he had spoken. "When This Sesshomaru was young, our father perished due to his attempts to save his human lover and their offspring – InuYasha. In inu youkai packs, the alpha is the dominant male at head of the family line. With his proximity and the recent death of our father, instinct drew This Sesshomaru to claim the hanyou as part of our pack. He would be raised in the way of youkai, strong and protected."

Kagome stilled, turning to look at him with wide eyes that twinkled in the firelight as she gaped at the youkai lord who was suddenly opening up to her so much. "What happened?" She wondered aloud, unaware that she had spoken until the words had fallen between them.

Sesshomaru sighed and closed his eyes, leaning against a tree and crossing his arms as he remembered that evening. InuYasha's wails grew more fervent and he refused to take the milk of the nurse that he had provided for the pup, his mother, with her knowing gaze standing patiently in the doorway, the warmth of the fire against his skin… much like tonight. "He wanted his mother."

Silence filled the forest, save for the occasional pop of the fire, and he wondered if she had turned away from him or fallen asleep. After a few moments of stubborn pride willing him to do no such thing, he opened his eyes to meet her sorrow filled gaze. In that moment, he knew she shared his pain. "A child needs a mother." She said, understanding how difficult that must have been for what was an adolescent Sesshomaru to understand.

He nodded slightly. "When you appeared, This Sesshomaru still blamed Izayoi's humanity for her behavior. At the time, it was difficult to understand that _all_ children require their guardians, and that the mother is the first in a line of many. Having our mother for our entire life led us to be blind to such matters."

Kagome smiled gently, turning to look at the bear carcass before continuing with her work. At first, he thought she was finished with their conversation. He certainly hoped so. It had been painful to talk about such things. Instead, she spoke once more, reminding him of how she was so different from other humans. "I think I understand. You were afraid I would take him away from you, just like she had. Although, I can relate to Izayoi's desires, too, being a woman and a mother. A strong bond, unlike that of anything else, is formed between a mother and her child. Still, your response was not out of true hate but more out of love. For that, I forgive you."

Her words struck him as if he had been pierced by an arrow. Love? _Love_?! Sesshomaru had never felt closer and yet further from understanding that mysterious word than ever before.


	3. Chapter 3

Sesshomaru didn't like to admit it, but he felt vulnerable. He had told her so much that he would have normally kept to himself. Why had he done that? Stomping through the snow, several feet ahead of her and Jaken, he shoved down the desire to turn around and check on her for the eightieth time since they had begun their trek once more. For the past few hours he had been trying to convince himself that he didn't really want her. It was just the normal order of things. She had become part of his pack by way of InuYasha, but the hanyou had not properly claimed her and worse – she had outright admitted that she did not belong to him. So it was only natural that he would want to take her for himself, right? She was just the first female his instincts turned towards, that was all!

Perhaps marrying the princess of the northern tribe wasn't such a horrible idea.

No. He had to stay firm. He couldn't marry the princess. If he did everything would be ruined. He was about to go on a long self-assurance pep talk when he heard Jaken squawking about something and turned to see that Kagome had fallen over in the snow. Sesshomaru stood for a few moments, but his eyes widened slightly when she did not attempt to rise. She had passed out. Rushing to her side, he turned her over, brushing the snow off her face and lifting her into his arms. He had been so busy worrying about the fact that he absolutely did not want her for himself that he had failed to protect her. For a few brief moments, he wondered if he even deserved her if he couldn't keep her safe in the elements.

"Sesshomaru?" Her voice was weak, clearly tired, and she sounded extremely disoriented. "Why do you not want to marry a princess? I bet she's pretty."

He snorted. She was probably going to become very ill and here she was worried about if the princess of the north was nice to look at. Holding her closer, he continued on through the snow. It would be better to get as much ground covered as possible so he could fly the rest of the way. If he had been alone, flying the distance would have been easy, but with another adult in tow he would not make it entirely to Hokkaido on his youki alone. Even he had limitations. Realizing she was waiting for a response, he said the first thing that came to mind. "She is very beautiful." Probably not the best thing to admit, but she didn't seem to take offense.

"So what's wrong?" The young woman asked, curling into him for warmth as she tugged the cloak further around herself.

"If This Sesshomaru consents to being the northern princess's mate, we will have to remain in Hokkaido."

Kagome blinked. "Forever?"

"Hn. Until our death."

She frowned. "What about Rin?"

Sesshomaru nodded, she was starting to understand. "She would have to remain where she is."

The sound of the wind blowing filled the empty void between them as she thought before speaking again. "But, you're male, wouldn't the female move in with you?"

Kagome was so used to things going that way; she was having a hard time understanding why things would be different in this time.

"If This Sesshomaru was the eldest son of the west, perhaps. We are not, so our mother made a deal with the northern pack."

Kagome gasped. "You're a bargaining chip for land? Your mother would give you away for that?"

His brow furrowed. "Not land, protection."

"That's even worse!"

"It is natural to form alliances for the safety of the pack."

Kagome sighed. "If it is so natural, why are you against it?"

Sesshomaru decided that he suddenly felt very tired and sought a cave to rest in. Finding one relatively free of other creatures was not easy, but once he did he carried her into the opening and sat on the ground, leaning against the rock wall and closing his eyes as he held her. She struggled and stood, and he opened one eye to see what she might be up to. When she wandered outside and returned without her outer kimono on, he realized she was cleaning herself up in the snow. Even now, she was fastidious about cleanliness. As she folded the cloth into a neat pile and placed it atop her parcel, he watched as she knelt in the moonlight, pulling the pin and comb from her hair. The dark locks tumbled down to cover her neck and shoulders in graceful curves.

Noting that Jaken was heavily asleep by his snoring, he was free to watch her and opened both eyes to stare at her as she knelt there, barely covered in the creamy linen cloth. Sesshomaru was mesmerized as he watched her draw the comb through her hair, forcing it to give and relax from the tangles that had formed since she had put it up. It was almost nostalgic to watch her go about preparing for bed. It reminded him of watching his mother comb through her hair. Every night he would watch her let down her hair and free the silver tresses before she would braid it into a simple plait – to keep it from becoming tangled – she said.

"Would you... no of course not, that would be silly..." Kagome began, breaking off just as quickly as she had started. His golden gaze fell on her, curious and questioning. She flushed slightly and he watched with fascination as she deftly braided her hair over her shoulder, securing it with a strange circular object that had been around her wrist. When she finished, she smiled and shrugged. "It keeps it from getting all knotted up while I sleep."

Sesshomaru simply blinked, staring at her as if she were some kind of witch who had read his mind. Surely she could not be so _coincidentally_ like his mother. This young human female was but a blink of an eye for his powerful dam, there was no way they could be so alike. Kagome looked around, as if uncertain, and gave a sigh.

"I wish I had brought my sleeping bag. That would have made the ground a little more comfortable on nights like this." When he held his hand out to her she gasped and stared down on it as if it might bite her. Realistically... it might.

"Kagome..." He trailed off, unsure what to say. Her breath caught in her throat at that. It was the first time he had said her name, and she closed her eyes as the slow tremble of the syllables falling from his lips raced up her spine. Deciding to take a chance, she put her hand in his, not knowing what might happen but letting her curiosity get the better of her. When he tugged her, pulling her to him, she let out a small surprised sound, barely a whisper. He held her between his legs as he leaned against the cave wall, and draped his furry pelt around them both.

Warm. That was the first thought Kagome's blank mind could come up with. She stared at Sesshomaru in awe, surprised and curious as to what he was thinking. His thoughts were not quite as romantic as she might have believed. He understood that she required warmth to survive and comfort to rest, and felt it was his responsibility to provide both. The fact that she smelled quite nice was not important. Nor was the fact that she was sitting between his legs, leaning into him and settling against his body.

Or, at least, she was trying to. Kagome sighed and tried to feel grateful but there was one serious issue with using the youkai lord as her personal pillow. He was not soft at all. It was the armor which proved to be the greatest barrier between her and complete comfort, and she shifted and sighed, trying to find a spot that would cooperate. After about the fifth time of her attempting to find a place to rest that wouldn't stab her eye out during sleep, Sesshomaru had had enough of her fidgeting and reached up to undo the ties of his armor, lifting it over his head and placing it beside him.

She was shocked, to say the least, that he had been so considerate. More than that, however, was the startling revelation that he was actually quite slender. The armor he wore typically gave him an appearance of being broad-chested, much like she imagined his father, but he was really very slim. Ironically, after having abused his kindness and trying to lay on him for several minutes, she was now nervous to touch him. Licking her lips, her face flushed heavily as she thought about how very intimate this was all becoming. As usual, her mind tried to find something to divert the awkwardness into something more controllable. Her gaze flickered around, trying to find something in what little light she had, and finally rested on his left arm which rested against his knee casually. "It must have been hard, when InuYasha did that."

He had watched her reactions, not sure if he was amused or annoyed at how every expression darted on and off her face quickly. Too fast for him to realize what she was feeling, another emotion would appear. When her fingers brushed against his arm, however, her gaze looking nostalgic and sorry, his breath caught in his throat. They had touched many times before, but now, with both of them nearly bare, instinct clawed at him to ravage her innocent body. Luckily, she spoke and shattered the desire as quickly as it had appeared. "It was an acceptable loss."

Kagome looked up at him, brow furrowing in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"This Sesshomaru had failed as an alpha many times. It is within the pack's right to dismiss the alpha if they are found unworthy. If InuYasha had the power, he could have killed This Sesshomaru and become alpha. A lost arm is a minor inconvenience and a strong reminder."

She blinked, clearly not in total agreement with his statements. Her humanity did not allow her to comprehend the youkai way. "Did you ever really want Tessaiga?"

Sesshomaru let out a heavy breath and leaned back, closing his eyes. Another of his lies had caught up with him and now she was asking him to bare his soul to her once more. Strangely, he did not mind complying. "No. While it was a powerful weapon, This Sesshomaru did not require it. As alpha, it was our duty to assure that the hanyou had whatever tools he required to survive and best his enemy. He was young, too young – having been pinned to the tree for so long – to fully grasp the power of the blade and would not have sought it out if This Sesshomaru had not made an attempt to obtain the fang. Without such prodding, it would have remained as it was found, hidden for eternity."

Her eyes widened. "So it was all for his sake?"

"Hn. An alpha protects those in their care, regardless of the sacrifices that must be made."

"But if you could regrow your arm like this, why didn't you?"

Sesshomaru stilled and took a slow breath. "Repentance."

"You were sorry?" She queried, clearly not totally convinced.

"It was our fault that InuYasha was untrained in the way of youkai. Worse, it was our fault that InuYasha suffered at the hands of his mother, which led to his declining protection and care through his early years. He was lonely, confused, wild… a failure in the honorable bloodline of our father."

Kagome felt heavy. He was bearing so much, revealing it all to her, and most of it was so very sad. He blamed himself for everything, it seemed. She had known there was more to the elder brother than readily visible, but had never understood the enormity of the difference between who he seemed to be and who he really was. No wonder Rin cherished him so quickly. He was loyal, dedicated, protective, and – even if he failed at understanding how to show it properly – affectionate. Her eyes lingered on his arm, before something stood out to her and she reached out to brush against his wrist with her hand. "There are no markings."

It was less a question, more a statement, but he nodded and responded anyway. Better to get her insatiable curiosity out of the way now. "Youkai markings are similar to the splotches humans can have when born. Typically, the more powerful of the mating will leave an imprint on the offspring."

Her brow furrowed and she turned to look, _really_ look at his markings for the first time. "They aren't like the ones InuYasha has when he loses control." She said, reaching up to run her fingers along the stripes on his right cheek.

He took a sharp breath in, eyes snapping open at her touch. Sesshomaru had never been touched this way by another before, except perhaps his mother when he was just a pup. Even then, it had been a rarity. Typically reserved for highly intimate moments, such as when his father had passed. While some youkai, particularly inu, were very physically affectionate, his dam was somewhat distant – she did not touch much of anyone. He had rarely seen her embrace his father, even. The sensation was startling and soft. When his eyes met hers in the dark cave, barely illuminated in the moonlight, he found himself leaning into her without consideration.

She, too, was caught in the spell this moment had caused. Her heart fluttered, hoping, wanting for something that she knew they shouldn't want from the other. When his breath brushed against her face, all she could say was a simple utterance. "Oh."

It was enough to break him out of his actions, and he remained where he was, not pulling away, but not closing the distance between them. "This Sesshomaru gained our markings from our mother, because InuYasha had only one youkai parent, his favor our father."

Kagome blinked, now also thrown out of the intimacy that had grown between them. "Wait… so your mother is stronger than your father?"

Sesshomaru smirked. "That is very common with inu youkai. The female is often the one that overpowers the male and claims him. This Sesshomaru understands it is different for humans." He couldn't stop the thought that lingered in his mind that proclaimed the difference was not such a bad thing. For a few moments, he could understand Izayoi's appeal to his father. While the great general had been very powerful and strong, he had still been bested by a female. To claim and own a delicate bauble that was his to command and possess had to be… enticing.

Luckily for Sesshomaru, Kagome's exhaustion sank in at once and she let out a yawn before resting her head against his chest. "Goodnight, Sesshomaru." She was nervous, but remained still as she reached up and gripped the cloth covering his chest in her small fist and soon fell to slumber.

He remained as he was, eyes wide as she clung to him. After several minutes he looked around, noting that no one was watching, and anyone who might would not question him. So there was no harm in wrapping his arms around her as he draped his fluffy pelt over them both and leaned into her, resting his nose in her dark hair. She smelled nice… enticing.

* * *

The next morning, he woke to find her already cleaned and dressed, standing at the entrance to the cave in the kimono he had bought her, the cloak draped across her left arm and the small bundle of her belongings on the ground next to her. She had left her hair partially down, the slight waves from her braid causing it to flow around her shoulders thickly. He watched as she reached out with one hand, fingertips curling as snowflakes darted across her flesh. She stilled and, as if she sensed it, turned to smile at him gently. "Good morning."

He said nothing, standing and gathering his things. Once his armor was in place again, he went to Jaken and was about to kick him awake as he always did, but she gasped and ran over.

"Please don't do that!" She cried, kneeling beside the snoring toad and reaching out with her hands to shake him lightly. "Jaken, it's time to wake up!"

Sesshomaru watched her as she cared for the toad as if she were his friend. The mothering instinct in her was very strong. That was good. No. It wasn't good… unless she was the mother to InuYasha's pups. He scowled and turned away, marching out into the snow and inhaling the crisp, cold air as the snow fell on his face.

It was just what he needed, something to pull him back to reality and get his mind off nonsensical thoughts, like Kagome… swollen with his pups and waking him in the morning with a kind smile and gentle tones. He shuddered and let out a low growl at his traitorous mind. This was all wrong. She was meant to be with InuYasha.

He could not take the hanyou's happiness again. Doing so would be admitting utter failure as an alpha.

That would not happen.

"Miko, it is time to leave." He ground out, making determined steps towards the north and ignoring the sensation of her spiritual energy flickering with some undefined emotion. How she felt was irrelevant right now. He had a task to take care of, in order to assure he could remain where he belonged. Afterwards, he could deal with her emotions and put her mind at ease, giving her to InuYasha and supporting them as they had a family. He could provide for their pups what he had failed in giving the hanyou. When the time was right, the pups all grown and Rin with her own offspring, he could take a mate. She would not be as powerful or offer as great a deal as the princess of the north, but it was better than sacrificing his dignity as alpha for a little protection.

Blessedly, Kagome did not speak for much of the journey, too focused on trying to trudge her way through the snow as it continued to pile on the ground thickly. She was even generous enough to eat while on the move, chewing the smoked bear meat slowly as she stumbled through the terrain and followed him. When night fell upon them, he considered continuing, but finally turned to see that she was in worse shape than the night before. Frozen to the core, having little chance for rest and minimal nutrition, she was struggling to maintain her distance with him, trying not to fall back. He had failed her again. With a sigh, he searched for some place to seek shelter, but none was readily available. After several minutes of no luck, he decided it was time to move a little faster. If the weather could not cooperate with his plans, he would have to outdo the weather.

Kagome gasped, startled when he appeared beside her and lifted her into his arms. Her eyes widened as he turned to Jaken, a silent understanding passing between them as the toad gripped onto his pelt before they rose through the air and took off quickly. She said nothing, still a little shaken at how suddenly he had gone from being so intimate with her to calling her _miko_ and treating her distantly. After about an hour, however, her curiosity got the better of her. "Are we flying the rest of the way to Hokkaido?"

Sesshomaru did not grant her a response, scanning the ground for shelter. His irritation rose as he found that they were nearing the coastal region. Caves would be scarce. Pausing, he stared down at the smoke rising from the huts of a human village and glanced down at Kagome before lowering several yards away from the settlement. "Go, find a place to rest."

She just stared at him as he set her on the ground, turning away from her and going towards the trees. "Where will you sleep?"

He stopped, but did not turn to her. "This Sesshomaru does not require sleep every night. If we must, we can rest in the trees. It will be adequate."

Kagome frowned and took a step forward, speaking before she could talk any sense into herself. "I don't want to leave you."

Sesshomaru turned to look at her, his placid appearance on his face as if nothing had ever happened between them. "You are not. This Sesshomaru is leaving you."

At that, he was gone as the wind gusted around her, blurring her vision from the world with a flurry of snow and causing her to cover her face with her arms. When things had settled down, she could no longer sense his presence. A wave of thick loneliness fell upon her and her breathing slowed. He left her. Her mouth slowly opened, trembling as she felt the tears tickle at her eyes. She knew it was silly. Knew that she shouldn't be so attached, so wishing, so longing for his presence… and yet. A sob tore from her chest, unbidden as she fell forward into the snow. Why did she care so much so quickly? She was a fool! How could she have convinced herself that he would even like her?

Worse, how could she abandon InuYasha for someone who would deposit her in the snow and leave her there to her own defenses in a village she did not know, without any money? No. She knew better than to doubt him like this. He had been more than generous and kind to her since they started this strange journey. It wasn't his fault that things were so confusing. If she was confused, how bad must it be for him? Did he suffer like she did? Or did he just find her a silly human girl, an amusement to pass the time?

With no one to answer her questions and the snow increasingly falling, Kagome stood and brushed herself off, reaching up to wipe at her face with her frozen hands before staring into the cold and dead forest before her. Her jaw clenched and her eyes sparked with determination, she took another step forward before screaming out into the world her heart.

"Fine! I don't need you! If this is some kind of test, I'll make it on my own! If this is your idea of generosity, I don't require it! I'm not just some trinket you can throw away! Do you hear me?!"

Only the cawing of a flock of crows was her response.

Sniffing, she turned and marched into the village, an angry expression on her face.

* * *

He listened to her scream out, yelling at him despite not even knowing where he was. She surprised him as she turned to look directly at him, as if she had known he was there. Impossible. She could not have sensed him at this distance. She was merely looking at random. It was the only way.

Still, her words and fury startled him even more. He knew she had a temper, but had only been at the brunt of it a handful of times. Part of him wanted to test her, to see if she really didn't need his assistance, but he fought against the urge to do so. Pushing her to be self-sufficient, to not require him, could be detrimental to his plan. He would let her have her way for the evening, and in the morning retrieve her and continue as if nothing had happened.

That, clearly, was not how things happened.

The next morning, he returned to the point where he had left her, finding she was not there. Minutes turned to hours and he pushed out his youki, searching for her. However, he did not find her. His brow furrowed slightly and he stormed into the village, ignoring the terrified gasps and screams of the villagers as he sniffed the air and continued his hunt. She was not in the settlement.

His instincts flared. How dare she leave? He started for the opposite end of the village, planning to scent her out, but when he reached the clearing on the other side… her scent was nowhere to be found. She had vanished.

A thick growl escaped from him and he glared down on Jaken. "Ask the villagers if they have seen her."

The toad bowed, turning to do as commanded, but grumbled under his breath about useless human females and their inability to be trusted. Sesshomaru hated it, but he was inclined to agree with his retainer. What was she thinking? He ignored the little voice in his head that told him that her leaving was his doing. He hadn't instilled enough trust in her, hadn't made her feel secure with him to where she would simply do as he requested – even if he never said the words. Still, how hard was it just to wait until she was told otherwise? When Jaken returned, breathless and screeching at the same time, he got his answer.

"Lord Sesshomaru! Lord Sesshomaru! The wench! She has left!"

What? He stared down on the retainer, face a solid stone but eyes revealing his confusion. She had left? How could she have gone by without his noticing? She would have had to pass him in order to return... unless... his fist clenched as he forced his voice to come out evenly. "Did anyone see which direction she went?"

"North!"

Both youkai were equally surprised. Jaken was surprised that Kagome was being so defiant and yet still headed north, Sesshomaru was more or less wondering how she might manage to make it in this weather. Alone... in the dark. Turning suddenly, he rushed out of the village and headed northbound, flying over the treetops and ignoring the cries of his retainer who had been left behind in his master's haste. The inu lord could not help it as his instincts clawed at him. What would he do if she were injured? Ill? Dead? He closed his eyes and stilled, sniffing the air, but only catching the scent of snowfall. How far had she been able to go? Pushing onwards, he frowned at the suddenly extreme fog that filled the area. He was nearing the shore. Could a human woman travel this far in this weather?

At once, he smelled her. Her fragrance wafted into his nose and he shuddered, noting that he did not smell blood. "Kagome!" He called, feeling somewhat frightened and unsure why – which only heightened the sensation. Landing, he looked around, trying to see her, but could only see a few feet around him before the thick fog obscured his vision.

"Are you sure you want to be seen with me?" Her voice rang out, but he couldn't grasp which direction it came from, the sounds echoing off the rocks and trees around him. Not that he needed to see her in order to tell how she felt. She spoke firmly, but her tone held a hurt pang in it. She was unhappy.

She was also right.

He had been afraid to be seen with her. He didn't care as much about the villager's opinions of him, but to have rumors spread that he was showing favor to a human woman other than Rin was not something he was ready to face yet. Sesshomaru knew that soon, he would have to accept that he had chosen this path. He was throwing away his dignity for the sake of being with his pack, but he had not fully come to face that reality. It was easier to tease her, to command her, to treat her as if she didn't matter – in order to not admit the truth. The fact that he _wanted_ to show her favor only heightened his desire to flee. This could not be happening. He was usually so composed, so sure, always in charge. Yet, here he was, worried for this human female... a female that, as far as he was concerned, only belonged to him in a very loose sense. She was pack, nothing more. Nothing more.

Growling low, he marched forward, trying to find her, his frustration mounting. He wanted to beat her for making him feel so vulnerable. To punish her for making him so frightened. To forget her for making him so weak. Yet, when her form slowly appeared in the fog, sitting on a large boulder at the shoreline, dressed in the kimono he had given her, all he could do was stomp over to her and pull her up into his arms, burying his nose into her hair and inhaling her fragrance.

Kagome gasped, eyes going wide as he drew her up from her seat. She had considered what he might do to her all night, knowing that her actions would upset him, but knowing he required this lesson. Yes, she was female. Yes, she was human. Neither of those made her dependent on him or fragile. She would not break just because he assumed she would. Her desire to be in his company was not due to what he could provide to her as a caregiver, but what he could give her as someone she cared for. No. _Loved_.

"Sesshomaru..." She began, licking her lips and looking up at him. His eyes were stormy, the typically hard golden hues now molten and swirling with many emotions. Those eyes... he always hid behind a solid mask, but his eyes would give him away every time. Reaching up, she ran her fingertips along his markings. "If you don't want me to leave you, don't leave me again." Pushing herself up, she moved to kiss him and his eyes widened as he gasped, turning suddenly. Her lips landed on his cheek and she held them there for a few moments before pulling away, her expression full of hurt and sorrow. Would he deny her still?

He pushed her away, causing her to stumble against the boulder with a cry. "Do not think that you have such rights to This Sesshomaru." He managed to grind out, his heart pounding in his chest as he turned to look away and over the water. They were nearly to Hokkaido. Arguing would do them no favors now. He had to pretend he liked her, even if it was difficult, even if it meant that he would have to lie to himself later. Inhaling slowly, his eyes closed for a moment before he turned to her and held out his hand.

She stared at it for a moment, before her lips pursed into a frown and she stood, pushing his hand aside. "No need, your highness! I can help myself up, thank you!" Kagome stood just as Jaken burst through the trees, out of breath and crying.

"Lord Sesshomaru! This lowly Jaken believed you had left us behind! Have you no need for us?"

Sesshomaru, once again grateful for the whiny toad's interruption, moved towards the water's edge and collected himself before turning to his companions. "We must cross the water at this point. From here on, the terrain is too dangerous. We will fly."

Kagome looked like she might be sick, swallowing down the thick mass that had formed in her throat before taking in a deep breath and nodding. "Right. Let's get this over with. The sooner, the better!"

When he took her in his arms, neither one wanted to think over the fact that, not only were they about to lie to a room full of powerful youkai, but also to each other.


	4. Chapter 4

Mizuki frowned. Her attendant gasped and slowly took a large step back, suddenly terrified that she may lose her life. Her lady never frowned. In fact, the powerful inu female rarely ever made any expression whatsoever. She had always stated that emotions were weakness and that it was better to guard from such things by not expressing them, than to allow feelings to give others the opportunity to take advantage of them. It didn't help that her notion was only confirmed by her mate, the one individual Mizuki had ever expressed emotions towards freely, without them being laced behind sarcasm.

This time, however, the lady of the west was clearly irritated. Her aura shifted angrily, tossing papers and cloth about as she passed through the halls, making her way through the large mansion of the northern pack towards the southern gate. News had traveled quickly. Her son had arrived. He was not alone. His companion was a human woman.

It had already been assumed that Sesshomaru might try something desperate. Mizuki and the northern alpha, Nobuyuki, had long discussed the western son's penchant for his "pack" and how that might get in the way of the mating between their packs. She had assured that Sesshomaru would likely try to fight it, but that he was obedient. He would be a dutiful son and follow what was right for the greater good of the pack.

She had believed this so thoroughly, that they knew exactly what to say when he arrived with the young human female. All had assumed it would be his ward, Rin, whom he had adored for so long. It would be easy to convince him if it had been her he brought. They would accept his claim on her, only if he would agree to mate the northern princess and join the two packs – thus strengthening their hold on the land against the opposing dragon clan which was once again trying to take more land for themselves. It was easy and simple for Sesshomaru to mate the princess and keep his little human pet on the side. Many powerful males took multiple females in an attempt to produce as many offspring as possible, no one would disagree.

The problem was that he had not brought Rin.

Shikon miko. Those words echoed through Mizuki's head and her fury grew as she took light, but firm, steps towards her son. How dare he bring such a dangerous female here? Worse, everyone knew that it had to be a lie now – some pathetic attempt to sway the court into agreeing that he was in love with this girl so that he could remain near his silly little "pack". No self-respecting inu female would accept a mating to an unwilling male that had his heart attached to another, particularly not if the opposing female was a dominant, powerful match. One like the child, Rin, was easy to overcome and could automatically be placed as a secondary bed warmer – but a strong female? The northern princess would have to fight for the right to claim Sesshomaru.

Had this girl been any other human, the chances of a fight would be high – and the human female would die. However, all knew of this particular human and her abilities. The purification powers she held were nothing to be taken lightly. Additionally, all held a begrudging respect for the woman-child for having rid the world of the blight that was Naraku and the irritation of the Shikon jewel. To go against the girl if she claimed Sesshomaru as her own would be viewed unfavorably. Even Mizuki had to admit that she could not look positively on the northern princess if she went after the miko.

Still, that did not mean she had to like the fact that her son had pulled such a stunt. Pausing at the doors, waiting for them to be opened, she closed her eyes and took a slow breath, collecting herself and putting her typically stoic mask in place. It mattered not. Her child's attempts at escape were futile. He was the last of her offspring that she had to offer and she could not waste this opportunity. Since this was clearly an attempt at collusion, she could easily win this. All she had to do was prove that they were not in love. Simple.

Afterward, she would beat her pup into a bloody pulp for even trying to outwit her. He was a thousand years too young for that yet. Unfortunately, what she saw was not what she expected at all.

* * *

When they landed at the gate, the large wooden doors opening to allow them through, Kagome followed behind Sesshomaru, their disagreement momentarily forgotten as her curiosity and trepidation grew. As the doors closed behind them and she noticed that they were surrounded by what appeared to be hundreds of youkai, predominantly inu, she felt her heart drop into her stomach and out of instinct sought reassurance. Her hand grasped onto Sesshomaru's, lightly, but clearly pleading. Surprising all, his fingers tightened around hers as he led her through the crowd, the youkai parting slowly.

Doors on the large castle ahead opened and Kagome gasped as what was likely the most beautiful woman she would ever see in her life stepped through. It was obvious who she was. The resemblance was remarkable. Yet, it still startled the young human girl when her companion spoke in his typical, empty voice. "Mother."

Mizuki stared down on the two, her expression not giving anything away, but Kagome knew her game and watched her eyes. Irritation, anger, confusion, even a bit of hurt... all swirled within the golden depths of his mother's gaze. Silence stretched for some time, and deciding she had to do _something_ she pushed forward, releasing Sesshomaru's hand and coming to stand between mother and son before bowing respectfully.

"It is an honor to meet you, my lady. I am Kagome Higurashi, the former guardian of the Shikon jewel and a..." Her voice cracked as the emotions from earlier bubbled within her, face flushing as she tried to fight down her thoughts. This was all an act. "...a companion of your son, Sesshomaru."

A few mumbles and gasps were heard from the crowd, but the elder female did not share in their confusion. A small smirk graced her features, a twitch of the mouth really, and she held out her hand before Kagome. "Greetings, little one, it would be This Mizuki's pleasure to give you a tour of the northern castle – it is quite beautiful this time of year."

Inhaling slowly, Kagome raised her head and forced on a smile, meeting the now amused gaze of the inu female before reaching out and boldly taking her hand. "I would quite appreciate that, my lady."

Even Sesshomaru was rather shocked at how things were going. First, none had known that the girl had a last name. Humans having first names were not that common to begin with, most were simply numbered. Their lifespans were short and they tended to remain in singular locations so it was rare for them to even require something like a last name. Surnames were a sign of honor... a sign of pedigree. How had he missed such vital information?

To add to his growing concerns, Kagome had been brave and bold, speaking without being asked and introducing herself before his mother – technically _his_ alpha – which any would take as a vie for power. In their customs, such an act was viewed as Kagome seeing Mizuki as an equal – as one not to be feared. When the girl took the powerful inu female's hand, their equality was only confirmed.

The fact that Kagome had spoken of him so intimately in such a large group, not bothering with his title, only compounded things. Ironically, that should have meant he was winning this and that their game would convince the others easily. So why did his mother seem pleased? It was not like her. Something was wrong.

He had little time to consider it as he watched his mother begin to lead Kagome away. When he moved to follow, a low and gentle voice called out to him. "Lord Sesshomaru, we meet again." Going still, he turned to look at the female, standing just half a head shorter than him, dressed in a heavy layered kimono, silver hair up in a complex pattern and held with many pins. The northern princess... she was very beautiful, of course, her amber eyes a deeper tone than his own, her pale skin holding a slightly more honeyed hue, with deep red markings on her face.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he responded with a nod. "Lady Yukino." This was awkward and uncomfortable. They had known one another since they were small pups. Being around the same age and having no other litter-mates to play with, they frequently had spent time together when their parents met for matters of politics. Yukino was a sweet girl, a kind and gentle soul that had developed quite differently than Sesshomaru. He might have even considered her a friend. He was doing this for her as much as he was himself. She didn't deserve to be shackled down to him when his instincts would demand him to be elsewhere.

It was Kagome who broke the strangeness of the situation, but how she did so only served to fan the flames of gossip even more. Turning to Sesshomaru she called out to him. "Sesshomaru!" When he looked to her, his expression still placid, but eyebrows rising in curiosity, she smiled. "Don't go too far."

Mizuki watched, waiting to see if her son would continue this game or if he would allow the human girl to look like a fool. Shocking most, including himself, he went to her, finding his instincts pulling at him to soothe the fear within her voice. She was brave, but she was alone in this place without him. Leaning in to whisper in her ear, she gasped and flushed, eyes going wide. "You are in This Sesshomaru's care. Any who harm you would be inviting death."

Kagome's heart swelled and she licked her lips before turning to him, the distance between them so minor she swore she could feel his nose brush against hers. Smiling, she instantly calmed, her aura bubbling around them and blanketing them in a wave of purity. The youkai around her hissed, pulling back from the stinging sensation. All of them, except Sesshomaru who was left with that unusual feeling of being tickled and had to once again fight down the urge to laugh. That urge soon became a dead weight that dropped down into his stomach when she replied, softly, sweetly. "Then I entrust myself to you."

No. Don't do that. Don't say that. Sesshomaru inhaled sharply and gave a stiff nod, turning away from her as if she had burned him. Kagome took that as her sign to leave, not realizing the implications of her words or actions. Turning to Mizuki, she gave an expectant look, and the lady of the west sourly gestured at the girl, heeding her to follow her into the large castle. Both understood that 'show you around' meant 'interrogate' and were all too happy to keep Sesshomaru in the dark. When they were behind closed doors, walking through the wide corridors, the lady finally spoke to the girl.

"You seem to be rather close with my son."

Kagome flushed and nodded.

Mizuki raised an eyebrow at that, but said nothing as she showed Kagome into what was clearly a library. A roaring fire in the corner popped cheerily as they entered the room and sat at one of the tables. A servant brought a tray with tea, and served them both before leaving the women alone to talk. "Yet you are not actually lovers."

The miko choked on her drink, sputtering and spitting some on herself, staring up at Sesshomaru's mother in disbelief. How had she... wait... how would a lover actually react? Taking another sip of her tea, she allowed the warm fluid to soothe her throat before looking into the piercing gaze of Mizuki. "I have no idea what you mean, my lady." At that, Mizuki sighed and was ready to try and scare the little human, when the girl decided to ask a question of her own. "He does not dislike the northern princess. Have you considered that he has other reasons for not wanting to follow your wishes?"

Suddenly, the lady seemed so very _old_ as she gave out a heavy sigh. "This Mizuki knows of our pup's "pack" and what has occurred over the years." Deciding to take a different approach, Mizuki continued. "We also understand that his desire to remain near the hanyou, the child, and you are all urged by an instinct that the pup does not fully comprehend and cannot command. He has done everything out of order. Typically, a male comes into the desire to form a pack after mating; it spurs on the desire to reproduce. Sesshomaru has no desire for such things as he has already obtained everything he would gain from mating a female without having to do so. Do you know what will happen to him when you, the child, and the hanyou perish?"

Kagome stilled and stared up at the beautiful woman, feeling a heavy dread growing within her. She had never considered what might happen to Sesshomaru when they die. Were they damning him to some sort of lonely existence? No. It couldn't be that horrible. "I assumed he would take a mate and move on, honestly."  
Mizuki snorted in a very unladylike expression, taking up her tea and downing it before pouring herself some more artfully, unable to snuff out her training. "He would die."

Silence reigned as the women stared at each other, an understanding passing between them in that moment. If Kagome were to help him with his plans, she would be dooming him to death? "How?" She wondered aloud before she could stop herself.

"They will kill him. The youkai you see outside, the ones in this castle, the ones in the very forest you live in. His weakness will be seen as a blight among our kind. Do you know what happens to a pup when they are born defective?"

Kagome had mental images of a mother smothering her newborn, the helpless puppy unable to defend against the attack. A narrator spoke over the gruesome scene, explaining how this was a matter of natural selection, to breed out the unworthy genes in favor of genes which would promote the health and longevity of the bloodline. Her face paled and she stood, knocking the tea over as she shook her head and ran from the room, entirely missing the slow grin that formed on Mizuki's face.  
Like taking a kill from a kitten. So easy.

* * *

Sesshomaru noted how most of the crowd dispersed as Kagome left with his mother. He knew his mother was not so kind as to actually give her a tour of the grounds, but also knew he could not disagree with his mother's offer. Instead, he watched them as they left, turning to find something to occupy himself when he came face to face with Yukino once more. She giggled. "She is very pretty."

What was with females and being so concerned about another female's appearance? "Hn." He replied, unsure what to even say to that.

Yukino giggled again and turned to walk, knowing he would follow her. They went through familiar pathways, until arriving at a gazebo within the center of the frozen garden, mostly hidden from the main grounds by the surrounding flora. When she turned and sat elegantly, he followed suit, sitting beside her. "It has been a long time, Lord Sesshomaru."

He nodded, trying to focus on the conversation but mind wandering elsewhere... to her. Was she alright? How was she holding up against his mother? His thoughts were so engrossed in Kagome that he failed to hear Yukino's question entirely. "What?" He asked, suddenly realizing that he gave himself away.

The princess did not seem to mind, smiling lightly. "Do you really love her?"

Sesshomaru's heart stopped. _Love_. What did Yukino know about _love_? She was inu just as he was! Even he still had no idea what that word exactly meant. Did it symbolize desire? If so, how could one love a child or sibling? Wouldn't that be reserved for mates? She watched his emotions swirl in his eyes, as he found that he was unable to come up with a proper answer. Smile widening, she let out a heavy sigh.

"I'm so glad!" Yukino called out, looking very relieved. Tears welled in her eyes and she tossed her head back, letting out a sigh. Sesshomaru's brow furrowed. Something wasn't right.

He had no time to pressure her for answers as a building of fear and purity pushed out and raced towards him. Standing immediately, he left the princess behind and ran to Kagome, who rushed at him, tears streaming down her face as she shook her head. "I can't do this!" She called out, her terror clearly ringing in her voice. "We can't do this!"

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at that, grasping her shoulders and staring down on her intently. "What is it?"

Kagome, chest heaving from running, took a few deep breaths as she tried to explain. "Your mother... she... you... dead... I... can't!"

None of that made sense. Sesshomaru felt worry niggling at his mind as he tried to figure out the best way to comfort her without losing himself as he had been prone to doing recently. Looking at her firmly, he spoke with a deep but solid tone, pushing his youki out to soothe her. "Kagome, listen to me." She sniffed and stilled, staring at him with wide eyes, lip trembling. He had to close his own eyes to keep from capturing that lip and forcing it into submission. After a few moments he opened them again, meeting her gaze. "Trust me."

She took a quick breath, nodding slowly. "Always."

"Sesshomaru. It is time." He looked beyond Kagome towards his mother who did not seem pleased, but was not as irritated as she had been before. Apparently, she had more than a few tricks to play. Taking Kagome by the hand, he dragged the startled girl past his mother and into the castle, down the familiar halls. He had spent quite a bit of his childhood in the northern castle and knew the place as well as his own home. Kagome struggled against him, trying desperately to tell him something, but he wasn't listening anymore. He was steeling himself against what he had to do just to get them to leave him alone, just to allow Yukino and his mother to walk away gracefully.

When he pushed through the large doors of a grand hall, the northern alpha, Nobuyuki sat at the head. He was familiar looking enough, bearing a strong resemblance to his brother – Sesshomaru's sire. They also shared a very similar personality trait... humor. The pale haired youkai smiled broadly, lifting his glass to welcome his guests. "Sesshomaru, my boy! You have grown into a fine warrior!" He leaned forward, canines peeking through his wide grin as he stared at Kagome. "I see you brought a snack!"

The others in the room laughed at his joke, but Kagome blanched and gripped onto Sesshomaru's hand tighter. They were just joking, right? They wouldn't eat her. Right? Mizuki broke through the terror with a laugh of her own. "Nobuyuki, you know you shouldn't terrify your dinner before you kill it. That always gives it such an abhorrent flavor." Again, the room filled with laughter.

A gentle voice called out, slicing through the laughter as Yukino stepped to the front of the room, gliding past Sesshomaru and Kagome. "This Yukino has an announcement to make."

Silence filled the hall, youkai shuffling into their seats and leaning forward as they looked to the northern princess. Slowly, turning to look towards Sesshomaru and Kagome, a faint smile appeared on her lips. "As many know, This Yukino was promised to Lord Sesshomaru many years ago. After his arrival with the human woman, attempting to fool us into thinking that he might actually love this creature, This Yukino decided that if Lord Sesshomaru honestly loved this woman, we would give him over to her with our blessing." Licking her lips, her smile broadened and she turned to face her father. "However, he does not love the woman. Therefore, This Yukino is here to declare before all that we are stating a claim on Lord Sesshomaru as our intended mate!"

Kagome gasped, tugging against Sesshomaru's grip even more. This was good, right? If he mated Yukino, he would live out his life as it should have been. He wouldn't be at risk of dying. Nobuyuki let out a hearty laugh and spoke in a clear voice, the sound echoing off the walls. "You bitches heard her. Do any of you wish to challenge her?"

All eyes turned to Kagome. She suddenly felt so very small and vulnerable. That feeling only intensified when Sesshomaru's grip loosened and she felt her hand fall free, her body stumbling back as she shook her head and stared up at him with worried eyes. Would he die because of her? Her fight or flight instinct kicked in and she turned to flee, only to pause in the doorway as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his embrace. Her head rested against the armor, tears welling in her eyes as she shook her head once more. "Let me go!" She hissed through her teeth, pulling against him.

When he leaned in to whisper into her ear, her heart jumped, breaking upon its return as his words rang through her head. "I don't want to leave you."

Squeezing her eyes shut, a tear fell from her eyes, trailing down her face as she turned to look up at him, a determined expression plastered on to hide her pain. "You aren't." Pushing away, she knew that she had hurt him when he released her. "I'm leaving you." She replied, turning to run through the halls and out into the snow covered landscape. Her heart screamed for her to go back, to take back those words, to tell him that she would _never_ leave his side... but they would be empty words. She would leave. Someday. She would die like all humans do and he would be left with no one to protect him from his fate. It was better this way.

Falling to her knees in the snow, a few feet outside the gate, a sob tore from her chest. If it was so much better, why did it hurt so much?

* * *

Sesshomaru watched her run from him, frozen in place. Her aura flared, clearly unhappy, the salt of her tears still lingered on the air... yet she fled. Left him. He should be angry. Or not care. Or a million other possible feelings. Yet, instead, he stood and watched, waiting for her to return. His mother's laughter caused his nose to twitch. Still, he could not turn away, staring at the heavy doors at the end of the hall.

Mizuki came to him, a small smirk on her face. "She was so very easy to break, pup. You have much to learn about trying to fool your mother. Come, let us go to your future mate, she has waited some time for this day." She reached out, grasping Sesshomaru by the arm and tugging, but he would not budge. Frowning, she pulled harder, eliciting a low rumbling growl from him. Her eyes widened and she raised an eyebrow, turning to look at the others before gesturing that the doors be closed. Leaving just her and her son in the hall, she sighed. "Sesshomaru, you must let go of this silly "pack" of yours and form a _true_ one. Yukino has desired you since you were barely weaned, it was at her request that we arranged for you to be mated. Would you rather not have a mate who respects all you can offer rather than a feeble human woman only here because of your lies?"

Sesshomaru's gaze narrowed. "What did you say to her?"

The lady laughed and shrugged. "Oh, not much, only that her decision to help you in this plan would lead to your sure death." Her laughter grew and she brought a delicate but deadly hand up to cover her mouth. "She actually believed that once your little pack members died off, you would be left with no choices and be murdered for weakness! Such fragile faith! You deserve a mate who believes in you. Come along now, it's time to get this over with and put all this silly nonsense behind us!"  
Instead of following, however, Sesshomaru remained where he was, still staring intently at the doorway. "This Sesshomaru will remain here."

Mizuki's eyes widened and she took a step back. "Sesshomaru! You couldn't!"

His gaze turned to her finally, firm gold eyes tinged with red, markings slightly jagged. "I will wait for her!" He bellowed, aura flaring out, daring any who might try to deter him.

His mother gaped, shaking her head lightly. "No. Not you, too." Turning suddenly, she shoved the doors to the hall open, startling all within, and cried out to her mate – her husband's brother – who had taken her in so that a young Sesshomaru would not be without. "Nobuyuki! He has fallen!"

The lord stood, eyes wide as everyone stilled and gasped. Yukino turned, a fearful look on her face as she ran to Sesshomaru's side. "Lord Sesshomaru! Let's go play together as we always did!" She took his hand in hers, delicately tugging on it. Sesshomaru's response was a growl and to shove the girl aside, causing her to fall back into his mother. Nobuyuki let out a growl, jumping over the table and rushing at the young male, shoving him against the wall.

Their auras flared, Sesshomaru lashing out with his venom at the lord. At that moment, another aura pushed against them as the door at the end of the hall opened and the small human woman rushed into the room, tears streaming down her face. Her eyes were wide as she ran to his side. "Sesshomaru!"

Yukino wasted no time in attacking, lashing out with her own red venom, tossing it at the girl as she ran towards Sesshomaru. Kagome saw the venom out of the corner of her eye and gasped, reaching up to guard her face with her arms as she fell forward. It never hit her. Sesshomaru shoved Nobuyuki away in time to lunge for Kagome, enveloping her in his embrace and pulling her to him as Yukino's attack sizzled through his clothing.

Kagome gasped, eyes opening wide as she reached up, pulling on him and turning to examine where she expected there to be wounds. Instead he simply had holes in his clothes over unmarred flesh. "How?" Was all her mind could manage to say.

"Lady Yukino is our cousin. Her sire and ours are from the same litter. Our venom cannot harm the other." He said, pulling her closer and leaning in to inhale her scent. "Why did you return?"

Her lip trembled and she felt a new wave of tears building. "I felt your aura flare. I thought you were in danger!" She clung to him, as if to reassure herself that he was actually there, pulse still racing from her emotions and all the running.

Mizuki frowned, arms crossing as she let out a huff. This was going terribly. Her son was clearly an idiot and had gained it from his stupid father by showing such loyalty to a human. How could any self-respecting inu female want to mate him now? "Sesshomaru... you cannot even claim her. Why behave so foolishly?"

Sesshomaru stood, lifting Kagome in his arms as he did so and not bothering to turn to look at his mother. "It does not matter." Looking down at the fragile girl in his embrace who had given up so much for him, who had trusted in him, who had left for his sake only to return for the same reason, he could not shake the growing thickness in his throat. He wanted her. Yet, his mother was correct. He could not have her. Still... leaning in to inhale her scent once more, he felt like he finally understood a bit more of how his father must have felt. "This Sesshomaru cannot mate Lady Yukino. We will take our leave now. Thank you for your hospitality."

Kagome was confused. What did she mean by that? Cannot claim what? She had no time to question it as they left the castle, not even bothering with the gate as Sesshomaru flew over the mountains, landing within a cave hidden by a large waterfall. "We cannot stay here long, Lady Yukino knows of this location and will come. She is... unhappy."

The miko nodded, standing and stretching, cupping her hands under the cool water and taking a drink before rubbing the remaining moisture on her face and neck. She stilled, staring at the falling water before her for a few moments before turning to look at him. "Sesshomaru?"

He didn't look at her. Couldn't look at her. It was taking every ounce of his strength to not take her there, in the hidden alcove beneath the waterfall and claim her for himself. Yet, his mother was right. She was not his to have. Even if she said that she didn't belong to anyone, InuYasha had made his intentions clear. It would be wrong of Sesshomaru to take her right from under him. The fact that they had a disagreement was not enough to break the bond between him and his sibling. He was the alpha and as such, he would take the higher ground and hold his head high... no matter how painful it might be.

Kagome's warmth startled him as she threw herself on him, causing him to look down on her with an unguarded expression of surprise. She looked up at him, smiling and laughing. "There you are." He blinked, wondering what she meant. He had been there the entire time. Was she hallucinating?

Perhaps he was the one imagining things. Instead of pulling away shyly, she tugged on him and drew herself up, standing on her tiptoes. He gasped, trying to draw back, but she leaned in and her lips brushed against his gently. For a moment, he lost control and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her with an increased intensity. Her lips were warm and cold, requesting and demanding. Soft. Enticing.

Not his.

With a growl he broke the kiss and pushed away from her, causing her to lose her balance and sending her tumbling to the ground. Bracing herself with her hands, she gasped and stared at the earth below her, heart racing. Why would he throw her aside? She wanted to be with him. Was what Mizuki said true? Was everything Sesshomaru did performed purely out of instinct? If that was true, perhaps he could not love her? Did that really matter anymore? Even if he couldn't, she was unable to go back now. Her heart would not let her return to InuYasha now that she had turned to Sesshomaru. It was impossible. So where did that leave them?

The bundle that held her clothes dropped before her and she stared at the cloth, blinking in confusion. "Change." He commanded, not saying another word as he tugged at the end of her obi, releasing the cloth and letting it fall loose around her. When she gasped and sat up, he was gone.

When she opened the bundle, what was inside caused her heart to break. It was not the plain yukata she had been wearing when they started this crazy journey. Lifting the green skirt in her hands, she wondered how he had even managed to get the clothes without her knowledge. The symbolism was not lost on her, of course. Once she put this on, everything would go back to the way it had been before.

Well... almost everything.

* * *

Sesshomaru sat at the peak of the mountain, hair whipping behind him as he waited for what he knew would inevitably come. Sure enough, there on the horizon was the familiar red dot, the pulsing aura and the cursing tongue. When he could smell his sibling, he stood, not giving any other indication that he saw him.

"Where is she?" InuYasha ground out, still irritated at their last encounter.

"Safe. She is waiting for you just below us, beneath the waterfall."

InuYasha's brow furrowed and he crossed his arms. "Just like that, 'eh? Had your use of her?"

Sesshomaru fought to maintain the placid expression he always wore, not granting such insults a response as he turned away. InuYasha scoffed and rolled his eyes, bounding down the mountain and heading into the cavern where he saw Kagome, standing in her old school uniform, a confused and sad frown on her face as she held a cloth bundle in her arms. "InuYasha?"

He nodded, leaning against the wall of the cave. "Where did you get those?"

Kagome shook her head. "I don't know. He gave them to me. I thought I had left them all behind in the future."

InuYasha's ears twitched at the idea of Sesshomaru having a set of her school clothes, let alone hanging onto them all this time. Whatever. It didn't matter. She was back. He would take her home and everything could go back to the way it always was. Shrugging, he stood and turned to her, crouching low and waiting for her to climb onto his back as she always had. Kagome stared at him, reaching out with her aura to feel for Sesshomaru as she climbed on, clinging to the hair and burying her face in it. As they took off, heading southward, she finally managed to find him. When their powers brushed, she gasped as she swore that she heard laughter. The wind drowned it out before she could say or do anything, and they were already several yards away.

Sesshomaru sat back in the snow, staring towards the south as he felt the familiar tickling of her purity brush against him. For once, he decided it was okay to let it out. No one was watching anyway. The laugh bubbled out of him before he could reconsider, but oddly the more he let it fall out, the more it hurt. Wasn't laughter supposed to show happiness?

"This Yukino was wrong." He immediately quieted and turned to look at the northern princess, raising an eyebrow and staring at her, wondering when she had arrived and how he had not noticed. She did not wait for him to question her, knowing what he would say. "Lord Sesshomaru, it was our fault for acting that way. This Yukino believed that you were incapable of love. In all these years of knowing one another, it has never appeared. Yet, the loyalty you showed earlier... and..."

She stepped forward, bringing her small hand up to wipe away the tear that had dropped onto his face, rubbing it into the curvature of his markings with a wistful smile. Her hand rested on his skin and he wondered why it did not feel the way it had when Kagome brushed his markings. Yukino's fingers were cold, distant, drawing nothing from within him.

"And?" He wondered, trying to ignore everything that had happened and gather the courage to move on.

Yukino shook her head, pulling her hand away and looking to the south as well. "You know where you belong, Lord Sesshomaru. Go to them." She would not say to him that she knew he loved Kagome. Telling him that would mean she would have to explain how she had discovered love when her own heart had opened to him so many years ago. It was better to let him learn on his own... and wait. Kagome would die someday and when she did, Yukino would be there to fill the void. What was fifty more years? It hurt, of course, to know that he would choose a human over her, but by then she could surely convince her father that she had gone mad and escape the trappings of tradition, joining him in his unconventional pack.

Sesshomaru stood, snow falling from his clothing as he took a slow breath, counting down the seconds as he built the walls around his heart and repositioned his unflinching mask. It was time to return to his pack, to his home. To her.


	5. Chapter 5

Kagome watched the children prance around in the field with a melancholy smile. Sesshomaru hadn't visited in four months, spring was already in full bloom, and Rin had naturally wanted to go pick flowers. The miko found herself unable to enjoy the signs of life, wishing for the cold and empty snow to return. With each day, it seemed to take longer.

InuYasha had acted as if nothing happened, forcing her to relinquish the items Sesshomaru had given her and burning them before her eyes. They had been sharing quarters until that day, the start of their failed attempt at being any more than two friends who cared for each other deeply. Kagome could take no more after that, however, and had angrily moved out, seeking refuge with Kaede and Rin. Her desire to distance herself from the hanyou was not an easy task to fill, however. If anything, he was trying even harder than ever before to gain her attention.

Any task Kagome might need to accomplish, he would be there to assist her or have already completed it before she had the chance. It was downright irritating, yet part of her felt guilty for not enjoying his affections. Wasn't this what she had wanted? No. She wanted to be loved, not treated like an invalid. That was the problem with InuYasha. There was no middle ground with him. It was all or nothing. Either she was incapable of doing anything for herself or she was expected to do everything.

Even stranger than InuYasha's sudden care for her well-being were the occasional visits of a certain pale haired, amber eyed princess. Yukino had taken to visiting frequently, familiarizing herself with Kagome and the others. The visits had become so regular, that Kagome was not even startled when the inu female sat next to her in the grass, letting out a peaceful sigh. "They look happy."

Kagome nodded, turning her eyes to half-heartedly glare at the other woman. She hated it when Yukino visited. The princess seemed to enjoy rubbing her past with Sesshomaru under Kagome's nose, telling her more than she had ever even wanted to know about the youkai lord – which did nothing for her chances at letting him go from her heart. Today, she had learned that Sesshomaru was born to his parents late in life for youkai, that he was essentially an accident. Mizuki had apparently already birthed _eighteen_ children for the lord of the west in an impressive and terrifying count of four litters. Kagome couldn't even imagine having six children at once, but Yukino seemed to feel this was only natural.

When Sesshomaru was born, Mizuki had been of advanced age for an inu female to give birth and most had not expected the boy to amount to much. He was small and of a litter of two, of which the first pup had been stillborn. Kagome had cried at that information, causing Yukino to blink and stare at her curiously. The girl had not even waited to allow Kagome's heart the chance to recover before continuing to explain how it was very clear from an early point that Sesshomaru was Mizuki's favorite. She babied him, gave him everything his heart desired, taught him everything she knew, and even stood aside as he claimed the hanyou InuYasha as his own – despite it not being his responsibility... despite knowing it would hurt him in the end. Mizuki had only ever shown love to her mate and Sesshomaru.

Yukino went on to describe Sesshomaru's other siblings, but Kagome could no longer hear her over the sobs that were tearing from her chest. How terrible she felt for utterly destroying a mother's chance to keep her child with her, instead of having him go his own way. It must have been lonely for both Sesshomaru and Mizuki, knowing that his pack was tearing him from his mother and her realizing that she would be forced to let him go. His mating the northern princess was her last attempt at rescuing her child, at bringing him home to her.

"What have you done to her?"

Kagome gasped and looked up, a hiccup tearing from her chest as she saw him standing before them, brow raised. Her lip trembled while she tried to come up with something to say, but words seemed to escape her, and so she just opened and closed her mouth like an idiotic fish that had thrown itself out of water. Yukino did not hesitate in responding. "This Yukino did nothing to her. She is simply overemotional about nothing."

Sesshomaru fought the urge to sigh and take Kagome up in order to soothe her. That game was over. She could not belong to him. He would not hurt InuYasha again. Surprisingly, the hanyou came up to them and did not yell or blame anyone, but put his arm around Kagome with a sigh. "Crying again? What are you so worked up about, Kagome?"

InuYasha turned to look at his brother and, what he had learned was his cousin, and frowned slightly. "Old hag says food is ready and the brat insists you two join us. Somethin' about pretty hair."

Kagome started to disagree, not wanting to spend any more time with the two youkai, but InuYasha dragged her away before she could say anything. Sesshomaru watched them go, fist tightening as he tried not to rip Kagome from the hanyou's arms. She was clearly distraught and required comfort, but it was not his place to give it to her. InuYasha would have to give up his claim on the woman before he could do that again. That was unlikely to happen.

Yukino watched them for a moment before following. She had known Sesshomaru since they were very young, his situation being somewhat similar to hers. Granted, she was not the youngest of her dam's litters – in fact, she had six younger siblings – but out of the litter she was born into, she was the only one to survive. It had been her sire's first litter and a devastating blow to the pack. No male heir within the first litter was not good fortune for the health of any pack. However, when Sesshomaru was born in the autumn, following her birth in the spring, it was not difficult to tell that they would be an easy match.

Or so it had seemed. Fate seldom worked in ways that one could predict.

Instead of following the way of their kind, Sesshomaru had come to claim his younger hanyou brother as the first member of his pack at a very young age. From what Yukino could tell about human growth patterns, it would be the equivalent of a twelve year old boy taking on an infant as his child. It was ridiculous, and all hoped that the hanyou would simply perish – as they often did – to save them the trouble of having to damage the fragile lord's instincts. Again, fate was a cruel mistress and sought to make it so that the boy not only lived, but that he brought something quite dangerous into the young lord's life – a woman.

Worse, the woman in question was not only human but a miko. It was tragic when lord Sesshomaru's father fell to the hands of the human princess, but she had been weak and pliable. None were all that concerned. Even when InuYasha had been born he was viewed as nothing more than garbage that had happened to fall out from the rubbish bin. A silly mistake that no one would dare talk about in polite conversations. It had been hoped that once Lord Sesshomaru returned to the pack things would improve. He would forget the hanyou, forget his ward and move on.

Now, that was no longer possible.

Yukino tried not to bristle as she sat beside the priestess, attempting to prevent Lord Sesshomaru from taking the empty seat between the younger woman and her mentor. When he sat across from them, she felt relieved only for a few moments. That success was short lived as she watched the human woman glance over at him and his gaze, never failing, met with hers. Irritation grew within the female inu as she accidentally dropped a bowl, spilling its content onto the girl next to her. "Our apologies, miko! We seem to be rather clumsy today!" She said with a light giggle, watching as Kagome gasped and then smiled, always taking things in stride, before standing and leaving the small hut to wash herself.

Feeling victorious, Yukino turned her gaze to her favored lord, only to find he was not there. With a sigh and a small pout, she sat back, taking a fresh bowl with a smile from the elderly hag at her right. Really, what was with him wanting a woman like her? Didn't he realize she would end up looking just like this old wench? Her lip curled in disgust as she eyed the elderly woman, her gaze flitting to the youngest female for a few moments before her thoughts were disrupted by InuYasha's laughter.

"You don't like her, do you?" He posed it as a question, but spoke it as a statement, handing over his empty bowl to Kaede and gratefully accepting his third helping before turning to stare at the princess.

Yukino huffed. She had no idea what he meant. Okay, that was a total lie, but really – who did he think he was talking to her like that? "This Yukino has no idea what you mean." She made sure to use a derogatory form of you, hinting at her disdain for InuYasha. It wasn't that she personally had much against hanyou, although they were frequently seen as trouble for any pack, but that she disliked how much a bother he was for his elder sibling. If only he would just go away!

The hanyou laughed, drinking down some more of his soup loudly before shrugging. "Whatever you say, princess, but I think it's pretty obvious how you feel."

The pale haired female raised an eyebrow and pursed her lips, setting her food down before folding her hands in her lap and tightening her gaze on the rather unkempt hanyou. He was entirely dirty, foul mouthed, lacked any manners whatsoever, and completely… right. How could one so strikingly inferior have such clear judgment? Deciding she would push his powers of observation to the limits, she smirked lightly. "What makes you say that? This Yukino has visited your miko frequently. She is quite fascinating."

InuYasha snorted and set down his bowl, ignoring as Rin took up the empty vessel and went off to clean the dishes. He leaned back, bracing himself on his palms as he looked at the snotty princess. "Yeah, yeah, I get what you're doing. You know, I'm not as stupid as you all think." Kaede made a noise that sounded like a mixture between a laugh and a cough, and he shot her a dirty look before turning back to Yukino. "Listen, if you're worried then just tell Kagome what you need. There is no reason to constantly come here and pretend that you're something that you're not. It's beneath you."

With that, he left, going out for a patrol and leaving a startled inu princess in his wake. Beneath her? What did he know of her? What did he know of being above anyone? He was lower than dirt! Her lip quivered and gasped when the elder miko gave her a knowing look, taking her bowl with her uneaten food inside. For once in her life, Yukino felt as if she was the butt of everyone's joke.

* * *

Kagome sighed as she knelt beside the river, frowning in the low moonlight. She could barely see the soiled spot of her clothing. Reaching down to cup some water into her hands, she brought it up to the leg of the garment, only to gasp when a familiar hand grasped hers and long fingers set to work on the dirty spot that would surely stain if it was not cleaned immediately. Looking away from him, she flushed and stared up at the moon, trying not to think of his proximity. "You don't have to do that."

Sesshomaru nodded. He knew this already, why did she insist on saying the obvious? Humming lightly, he continued to wash the soup off her miko clothing, dipping his hand in the cold water once more before scrubbing vigorously. If he was totally honest with himself, he had cleaned it thoroughly enough by now, but he wasn't going to be honest. Instead, he was going to lamely steal time with her. Precious moments together, without anyone else to hinder their conversation – ironically, neither knew what to say. "Kagome…" he started, but she interrupted him with a sob before he could continue.

Tears sparkled in her eyes as she turned to look at him, her expression hurt and confused at once. "Why do you insist on acting this way? Can't you just leave me alone if you're going to leave me alone?" At that, she pushed away from him, trying to flee as her heart constricted. She just wanted to go hide somewhere and lick her wounds and try to forget, was that too much to ask?

Apparently, it was. His fingers closed around hers, and she gasped, falling back into him as he pulled her lightly. Her shoulder bumped against his chest. She sighed, lowering her head. Why did he insist on torturing her like this? She really couldn't understand. When he spoke, gently, nearly inaudible to human ears, she felt her heart crack. "It was never This Sesshomaru's intention to leave you alone."

Her face contorted into a scowl, and she let out a broken laugh, shaking her head. "Intention! Intention?" Turning on him, her eyes burned with her frustration. "Don't be stupid! Your intentions are only half the problem! What about my feelings? Did you ever consider that?" Surprised, he released her. It was true, he had never fully thought about what she wanted or how she felt. That was not the inu way. What she felt was irrelevant in comparison to a claim by another inu. At the moment, he was still claimed by Yukino, and Kagome was claimed by InuYasha. According to everything he knew, this meant they could not be together. If they were to try, it would only end in tragedy. She stared at him for some time, eyes quivering with emotion before she shook her head and ran from him, leaving him there to contemplate this new dilemma.

Her feelings. What would he ever do with those? Wouldn't she be happier with InuYasha, which would assuage her feelings? She loved the hanyou, after all, right?

Part of him wanted to ask her outright. Yet, part of him realized that he could not. He was afraid. If he asked her and she said yes, everything would fall into place, but he would not be happy with such an answer. If she said no… he would not be happy with such an answer. No matter what he did, he seemed to be doomed to hurt someone important to him.

* * *

Kagome rushed into the hut, only to pause when she saw Yukino sitting there by the fire with a surprised look on her face. Her expression only became sourer as she stared down on the princess. "Why are you even here?" She managed to grind out, finding her anger and irritation with Yukino to be a fine substitute for her frustration with Sesshomaru.

The princess raised deep golden eyes at her, pointing her nose in the air in that manner that only aristocracy could, and letting out a huff. "This Yukino does not require your permission to be anywhere, human."

At that, Kagome felt something within her snap and her eyes widened. Furious, she rushed over and gripped the collar of the inu female, ignoring the sideways glances of Kaede and Rin who both knew better than to interfere. Lifting, she dragged the startled princess out of the hut, tossing her into the dirt outside with an angry roar before dusting her hands off. Pointing an accusing finger at the female, Kagome released a great amount of the emotions she had been holding back.

"Listen here, little miss princess, this is _my_ house, _my_ village, and _my_ life, and you have no authority here! You have been welcomed here as a guest by way of our deep respect for Lord Sesshomaru, however, it has become abundantly clear that you do not care for those who reside in this village and are only here to cause distress! Therefore, you may leave! Do not return unless you wish to face the end of an arrow!"

Kagome spun on her heel, moving to stomp through the door only to pause in the doorway when Yukino laughed. "Why Kagome, your arrows do not frighten This Yukino."

The human girl shuddered with her fury, pushing through the cloth that hung down over the entrance. Yukino smirked, standing and brushing herself off with a sigh at how her clothes were now ruined. What she hadn't expected was for an angry, animalistic sort of sound to come from within the hut.

"Ye do not know what ye are doing, child! Calm down!" Kaede pleaded loudly, but it was no use. Kagome burst from the hut, waves of spiritual purity washing out from her as she pulled an arrow taught and aimed directly for Yukino.

"Get out!" she screamed, bellowing and causing more than a few villagers to peek out their doorways warily. Kagome's body trembled, tears welling in her eyes as she stared down the irritating female who had been causing her no amount of distress the past few weeks. She knew she was making a fool of herself by now, but she was just so angry - so tired of all of this. "Go home and don't come back!"

"Kagome…" The miko flinched at her name, glancing to see a shocked InuYasha standing next to her. His eyes were soft, ears drooped slightly, shoulders loose as he shook his head and reached out, taking the bow from her easily. The young woman crumpled, face falling into her hands as she sobbed and allowed all the sadness to escape at once. InuYasha turned to look at Yukino. "You heard her. Get out."

Yukino's eyes were wide as she looked around, wondering what this strange sensation was. She had never been an outcast before, never been ridiculed or shunned. After all, she was the eldest daughter of a prominent youkai family. Who would dare to turn her away? Her gaze fell upon the crying human woman who rocked slowly, trying to overcome her emotions. Pitiful. Turning her back on the scene, she went to leave with her head held high, only to pause and stare as the last one she wanted to witness such an occurrence stood, watching with his typically placid gaze. Bowing out of respect, she smiled. "Lord Sesshomaru, it is a lovely evening, would you care to see This Yukino out?"

He took in the scene before him, having watched Kagome toss the female like nothing more than a heavy sack. Sure, she hadn't done much more to the princess, but one thing was very clear, she had made at least some of her feelings known. "This Sesshomaru has no obligation to you anymore, Lady Yukino. It would seem that you have lost your claim on us." With that, he turned from her, leaving her to be surprised and more than a little hurt as she walked away.

It hadn't occurred to her that Sesshomaru might view Kagome's dominance over her as a sign that her claim was no longer valid. Still, she could not fault him for that. Yukino had never been much of a fighter, really. She was skilled with a few limited methods of battle but was really not very good in hand-to-hand combat, and so she had no method with which to respond to the miko. To be quite honest, she had never studied such things very diligently, like other females did, as she had always felt her mating to be so firmly set in stone that none would argue it. Now it would seem she had lost her chance forever. Leaning against a tree for support on the edge of the village, Yukino's lip trembled as a sick sensation built in her abdomen. How could this be?

Sesshomaru waited until Yukino was gone before turning again, knowing he would likely find Kagome gone or see his brother helping her in some way, it was how it should be. Yet, he was surprised to see the hanyou standing beside her, thoughtfully watching for a few moments before looking up at him. Their eyes met and for a few brief moments, Sesshomaru recalled his eager young pupil, who had admired and loved him so. InuYasha grumbled and turned, leaving the girl where she was and going to his empty home… alone.

Several long minutes went by as Kagome continued to sob at the threshold of the elderly miko's home. Sesshomaru's throat was dry as he slowly took in the situation. Was InuYasha really going to just leave her there? If so, did that mean what he thought it meant? Worse, if it meant that… what would he do? He couldn't act hastily. The hanyou might just be upset with her; it could be nothing. Yet, part of him hoped that what was happening was true. Just the same, he would not take any action tonight. It was too soon.

Better to let the hanyou thoroughly make his decision. He didn't want to cause any more upset by acting rashly. Sesshomaru had already done that so many years ago. There was no way he could ever pay for the price of what he cost his young pack member. Standing aside and letting InuYasha have the freedom to choose was the best he could do.

Closing his eyes tightly, Sesshomaru turned away, taking heavy steps as he walked towards the forest and left Kagome sobbing in the darkness.

* * *

Days went by and Kagome felt relieved to not have to deal with a single silver-haired canine. InuYasha was avoiding her; Sesshomaru was out doing whatever it was he did, and Yukino had been blissfully absent – it was heaven, the young miko decided as she hefted another bucket of water towards the house, successfully setting it down before Kaede with a victorious grin. The elder woman nodded in understanding. She had been a young woman in love once, too, after all. She knew that Kagome required this distance in order to heal from the pain of losing that love.

It had happened to her, after all. Granted, her lover was not a youkai. He had been a man, just a simple, ordinary man who had nothing to offer more than a kind smile and a few words of praise. Yet, Kaede had loved him nonetheless. When it was called on her, a young miko-in-training, to take over the shrine duties after her sister's death, she knew her hopes of a future with him were dashed. She had to endure watching him marry another, although he seemed happy. After his death at the hand of a lower-level youkai, Kaede had to struggle with the enormity of her emotions entirely alone. She had never even felt the warmth of his embrace. She could only imagine how difficult it must be for Kagome.

Part of her wondered if it might be better for the girl to return to her own time. At least her mother could be there for her. "Child…" She broached, causing Kagome to pause in her task of gathering laundry and turn to her with a curious gaze. "Have ye considered returning to ye own time? Perhaps ye should go home?"

Kagome nearly dropped the cloth in her hands, catching the mess before giving a broken laugh and shaking her head. "I can't do that, Kaede. This is home."

At that, the young woman left, taking the laundry with her, but the elderly miko was not ignorant to the fact that the girl had gone away from the river and towards the well. When Kagome reached the well she went over to it, tossing down the dirty clothes before brushing debris off the lip. A nostalgic smile drifted to her face, before her brow furrowed. A familiar presence pushed against her and she turned to look with a melancholy gaze at him.

"Go home if that's what you want. Don't expect me to come after you, though." He said with an annoyed tone, crossing his arms and leaning against a tree.  
Kagome blinked and nodded. "I know."

The hanyou scoffed, ears flattening against his head as he raised an eyebrow at her. "I don't get it. What do you see in him?"

She shrugged, letting out a broken laugh. "I don't get it, either, InuYasha." Leaning back, she closed her eyes and lifted her face towards the sun, allowing the warmth to embrace her. "It wasn't as if I expected or planned this. One day, I was just trying to figure out what had caused the wide gap between you, trying to bring you together so that you could have family. The next thing I knew, I was learning more about him than I had ever even imagined."

InuYasha snorted. "You knew what caused the wide gap between us, Kagome. I hate him. He's done nothing for me but try to kill me!"

Kagome turned to him, the wind shifting suddenly and lifting her hair as her gaze bore into him, suddenly firm and angry. "He did _everything_ for you!"

Only the sound of the wind rustling through the trees filled the silence as they stared one another down, Kagome furious that InuYasha had never even tried to know his elder sibling and InuYasha shocked at her claim. How could that even be true? "Keh. Don't believe his lies!"

She shook her head. "They aren't lies, InuYasha. If you can't trust me, ask Yukino! She has no reason to hide the truth from you, right?"

The hanyou blinked. He hadn't expected her to realize that he was spending time with the inu princess lately. After Sesshomaru had turned her away so coldly, he went to her to question her on what was happening. It was then that he learned the truth of Kagome's feelings and how she and Sesshomaru had formed an emotional attachment during their time together. Face contorting into a scowl, he scoffed at her and rolled his eyes. "Doesn't feel so great when it's your turn to experience it, does it?"

Kagome sighed. "InuYasha… you can meet Yukino if you wish. I will not stop you. I have no right to. If that is what makes you happy, I will support that. What hurts is that you might trust her over me, who – despite everything – is still here at your side."

"But you don't _want_ to be at my side anymore, Kagome! You want to be with _him_!" The pained, desperate tone in his voice betrayed how hurt he was and tears stung at her eyes. He growled low. "Don't you dare cry for me. You have no right to cry for me now." Pushing away from the tree, he grumbled something under his breath about his luck with women before stomping down the path towards the village.

Feeling as if nothing had been resolved and everything had become worse, Kagome reached for him, crying out for him to return. "InuYasha! Please, we need to talk about this!"

He stilled, his red robes fluttering in the wind as he turned to look at her. "No, we don't. There isn't anything to talk about. I promised Miroku I'd help him with some repairs on a few buildings, so if you'll excuse me… I have better things to do with my time."

With that, he left her there to stare as he walked away. She had expected him to get angry, sure, but she had anticipated that he would throw a fit and be coarse, that he would beg her to stay with him, that he would do something stupid or violent. Sitting back, she realized that she really didn't know either brother when all this started. Sesshomaru had always been a mystery, and InuYasha had grown into someone else – someone more mature - without her even noticing. Worse… now she had neither of them. Not as a lover, not as a friend. Nothing.


	6. Chapter 6

The pack – the most important part of an inu youkai's life. They are born unto the pack belonging to their dam, protected by their sire, raised by all who belong to the unit that is solely known as _pack_. Unlike human families, which can branch off and become weaker through disconnection, inu packs are unified in a singular goal: protect the pack above all cost.

When they come of age, young males may go out and seek a mate – a female who can provide them with greater lands, greater genetic possibilities through stronger offspring, and above all one which can be loyal to him to the end. Only the strongest will gain their own pack, singular from the one they were raised in. This is the way of the inu youkai, since before time was measured.

Miko – one of the most dangerous enemy of the youkai – their purity only slightly less deadly than the Bhikkhu in that their purity can be tainted, due to their imperfect bodies. Despite this downfall, they are still formidable opponents and are therefore avoided at all costs. Fortunately, only humans are born with such ability and therefore youkai can easily outlive these potentially deadly foes.

All of this information would be considered the very basics of what an inu pup might learn from their sire or dam. So where did Mizuki go wrong?

The inu female watched from above as her niece and the hanyou continued to form an unusual relationship, the humans in the village acted as if nothing was out of the ordinary, and the young miko behaved as if this was how her life was supposed to be. There was just one major problem with that: this was _not_ how things should be going! News had spread fast that Kagome had bested Yukino easily. Nobuyuki finally admitted that his eldest daughter had not received much training in the way of self-defense since she had decided at a young age that Sesshomaru would be the one for her. Being the spoiled, cherished daughter – she got away with it. Unfortunately, that led to some problems.

For one, since Kagome had shown a lack of deferment towards herself, she ran away with Sesshomaru, _and_ beat Yukino to where the princess had lost her claim. It was accepted by most that the young human woman had claimed Sesshomaru for herself. This, in turn, caused a serious problem whenever Mizuki tried to find some way around this mess. She would never admit it to anyone, but she was worried for her son's life. If he attempted to mate Kagome, there was a strong possibility that she may kill him. No one could be certain. It had always been taboo for a youkai male to take on a miko.

Even worse than all of that, however, was the blow to the pack. By Kagome claiming Sesshomaru, but not actually mating him – from what it seemed she wasn't even _speaking_ to him – an insult had been brought on the pack. Were they, one of the most powerful inu packs in all of Japan, not worthy of a single human female's attention? It was up to Mizuki to right this wrong. Either Kagome would fulfill her end of the claim and go to Sesshomaru, or Mizuki would be forced to fight her and kill her.

Jaw setting, the elder inu lowered and landed lightly on the ground behind the girl, watching as she scrubbed clothing in the water and hummed an unusual tune. "Do you mock us, little miko?"

Kagome jumped and let out a squeak, nearly falling into the water. Bracing herself against the ground, she turned to gape at Mizuki. "Lady Mizuki! I'm sorry; I didn't notice your approach. What did you say?"

Fury darted in Mizuki's gaze as she stared down at the insolent girl. "This Mizuki will not repeat simply because you are too fickle to listen!"

The miko sighed and nodded. "I'm sorry. What can I help you with?"

Mizuki considered ripping the human girl's head off right there. Did she have no clue as to what she had done? "You will renounce your claim on our son."

That got Kagome's attention, and she dropped the clothing into the stream, the thick cloth making a slapping sound against the rocks she had been using to scrub with before sliding into the water. Her jaw fell open as she stood, shaking and uncertain, before looking to Sesshomaru's mother. "I do not understand what you mean."

Mizuki sighed in irritation. "Clearly you will not fulfill your claim, if you cannot drop your claim… This Mizuki _will_ kill you."

Kagome's lip trembled. "What claim?"

"When you bested Lady Yukino, her claim was void and yours was clear. Do you deny such things?"

The ebony haired girl shook her head, bringing her cold shaking hands up to hug herself. "No… I… I just… wanted them to leave me alone."

Mizuki raised an eyebrow at that. "So you do not desire our son? He is unworthy?"

At that, Kagome stilled, looking up at Mizuki with solid eyes full of determination. "He is worth so much more than me."

The inu female growled low. "So your claim still stands? Fine, since you refuse to act on said claim and continue to shame our pack, This Mizuki is left with no choice but to kill you."

Kagome gasped and considered running, but she knew she wouldn't stand a chance. Staring at the infuriated woman before her, she flinched and closed her eyes as a delicate but deadly hand reached up to slash at her face. Waiting for the stinging blow that was sure to come, Kagome realized that too much time was passing. Opening an eye, she gasped and opened both wide to see Sesshomaru standing between them, gripping his mother's arm angrily.

Mizuki's eyes widened, and her lips pulled back in a snarl as she pushed back against her son, attempting to throw him off. He held her firmly, staring down on her with a mixture of sorrow and understanding. "You would disrespect your own alpha for the sake of a female that does not want you?"

Sesshomaru's gaze tightened and he gripped harder, a cracking sound echoing in the distance as Mizuki's bones constricted within his grasp. He leaned in, pushing against his mother and throwing her off balance slightly. She gasped. This was unexpected. Males were typically not as dominant as females among inu – usually a male would bow to a superior female, giving her full power of him. Yet, here was her own son, not just any son … her _favorite_ son, fighting her for the sake of a human girl. Worse… a _miko_.

The young girl gasped from behind him, shaking her head firmly as tears streamed down her face. "Stop it! You're family! You aren't supposed to fight!"

Both inu turned to blink and stare at her as if she had lost her mind. Sesshomaru finally spoke, his voice slightly gritty with emotion. "You are part of our pack. Our mother threatened you. Therefore she threatened the pack. It does not matter that she birthed us, only that the pack survives."

Kagome shook her head, coming around and gripping his arm in a feeble attempt to pull him away. "No! It does matter! I could never forgive you if you hurt your mother, Sesshomaru!"

Mizuki's eyes widened and she let out a feral growl, pushing against her son in an attempt to swipe at Kagome with her other hand. "You bitch! Do you think you can command him even now? You are not his alpha!"

Sesshomaru was torn. He was supposed to protect Kagome from his mother, she was part of his pack, but yet she had said she would be unhappy if he protected her. How was he supposed to do both? Quickly making his decision, he released Mizuki and gathered Kagome in his arms, rushing from the village. Mizuki stood there for a few moments, shocked that her son would go through so much trouble for a simple human female, before her aura flared and her markings stretched as she transformed, giving chase.

InuYasha, Yukino, and Miroku all stood with similar surprised expressions. It was the princess who spoke first. "They are both going to die!"

The hanyou snorted. "You obviously have never fought with either one of them." Miroku nodded evenly.

Yukino shook her head furiously. "No! Lady Mizuki is a skilled fighter! She bested _your_ sire!" The hanyou's eyes widened, and he gulped, wondering if they really were going to die. That wasn't something he wanted to accept, however. He moved forward, ready to charge after them, but was halted by his friend's hand on his shoulder.

Miroku shook his head lightly. "This is their battle."

It was all that needed to be said. While her initial connection to the youkai lord had been surprising, it was not lost on the other villagers that Kagome's affections had grown significantly. Over time, it was very clear to everyone that she genuinely _loved_ Sesshomaru – and by his behavior, it would seem that he was forming such attachments to her as well.

InuYasha had discussed the situation at length with Miroku. The monk had listened quietly, never saying much more than an occasional hum. Once the hanyou had ranted out his frustrations, the man finally spoke clearly about how it was obvious that he and Kagome had what many would consider a "first love". InuYasha had balked at this, pointing out that he had loved Kikyo before her and the monk nodded before pointing out that they were for him, essentially, the same woman. Sure, while in many ways they were very different, InuYasha still had a hard time telling them apart. Occasionally, he mistook the younger girl for her elder reincarnation – even now, many years later. As far as Miroku was concerned, that was proof enough that InuYasha's heart merely saw Kagome as a replacement for Kikyo - a pretty bandage to hide the painful scars.

He knew now that Miroku was right. This was no longer his problem. That didn't mean he had to like it. While he understood that Sesshomaru was not the cold-hearted prick he had always made him out to be, it was still a difficult pill to swallow. Even harder to face was the idea that Sesshomaru had actually been _suffering_ because of him. Had been lying, to himself and others, when he said that he felt disgusted by InuYasha's relation to him – going so far as to tell others to not refer to them as siblings. Yukino had explained everything to him, however, after much prodding on the hanyou's part at trying to figure out just what Kagome even saw in the ice prince.

It was hard for him to accept that his own mother, who had always seemed kind and loving to him, had done those things. She was a little unhinged, sure, constantly muttering under her breath at how his father had left her to her troubles in the time when she needed him most. He had never understood that, always wondering if she blamed his father for his existence and how much difficulty his upbringing brought upon her. Still, he knew the words that Yukino spoke were the truth. He could recall the day he found his mother, dead in a pool of her own blood. She had slowly lost her sanity, unable to cope with the hardships of her life. Carved into the once pristine flesh she had cherished in life were the words of her sorrow. He had always believed she was sorry for leaving him. Now he truly understood the meaning of those words: _with great sorrow and humility, I go to him and plunge you into loneliness, for I have turned you away from the gentle light of the moon… forgive my selfish pride_.

* * *

Kagome's heart raced as Sesshomaru ran, trying to outrun his mother as she pursued them. "Have you both gone crazy?!" She yelled, trying to hold down her hair as it whipped around her face.

His eyes narrowed, and he glared down on her. "Have you? What possessed you to think that you could ever come between This Sesshomaru and our dam?"

The young girl rolled her eyes at that. "You were fighting because of me! I don't even understand what she was talking about!" She yelled back, they both were yelling because of the intensity of his speed and the howling of the wind as they pushed against it. Of course, she was pretty certain they would probably have been yelling even if they were in total silence.

Sesshomaru growled low, shoving off a tree and darting suddenly out of the way as his mother caught up with him and attempted to knock them over with one of her enormous paws. A fraction of him was surprised that the woman in his arms did not scream in fright. Her response, however, should not have shocked him how it did. Instead of crying in horror at the sight of the enormous inu clearly wanting to kill them both, Kagome's eyes widened and her mouth fell into a large grin.

"She's so pretty!"

He fought the urge to groan at the woman's antics. Only a human like Kagome could think that was even close to what she should be saying in such a situation. "Hold onto this." He commanded, handing her the end of his pelt and frowning as he gathered his energy. "Tightly." He amended, assuring that if she did not understand his meaning through the words he spoke she would through the tone in which he said them.

Kagome gulped and nodded, gripping to the fluffy white mass for dear life, suddenly too afraid to do what she had thought of when he first gave it to her. Instead of cuddling it and embracing the softness, she wondered what he might be doing, only to let out a squeak of surprise and scream his name as she began to drop downwards into the sky, a rumbling of building youki pushing down on her as she did so. Struggling to hold onto him, her body trembled as she dared to look up, gasping at how amazing the sight before her was.

She had seen this once before, but the last time she had witnessed it he had not exactly felt favorable towards her. In fact, it had been _her_ he intended to kill that time. Now, unabashedly, she was able to watch him transform and for a brief moment, she forgot entirely about the fact that Mizuki intended to murder them both, that he was still treating her as if she was nothing more than something to protect because of pack loyalty, or that she was dangling from the sky several thousand feet in the air and could become a Kagome pancake if she let go. Instead, all she could do was watch as he shifted and grew, seeming to explode from a tiny package into an amazing and enormous dog.

When he twisted suddenly her eyes widened once more and she let out a small scream as the end of the pelt flipped upward with such intensity that she was forced to let go. Her body flew up, arms and legs hanging down as she stared at the full form of Sesshomaru, only to realize his intentions when she collided with his back, landing in a large sea of white fur that billowed around her like a protective blanket. Understanding without having to be told, she grasped onto his coat and pressed herself against him, waiting for him to continue to flee.

He did not.

Sesshomaru turned to his mother and let out a fierce growl, the sound rumbling up and vibrating through Kagome's body which caused her to shiver. What was he doing? Was he an idiot? His mother would surely kill them!

Mizuki paused before them, letting out what seemed to be a series of whimpers and growls. Sesshomaru didn't appear to be affected, snorting heavily and leaning forward to look down on his mother, who was somewhat smaller than him now. Kagome let out a squeak as he lunged forward, not moving to attack, but trying to intimidate. Mizuki growled out and bit at her son, clearly furious.

This was all wrong.

They shouldn't be fighting.

Kagome knew this was true, but had no idea how to stop them. When Sesshomaru shifted, dodging another swipe of his mother's paws, she realized that this was all for her and if she did nothing, it would only end badly. Lifting herself up, she tried to cry out to them, begging them to stop, but they could no longer hear her. Her voice was drowned out by the rough winds that pushed and shoved against them as they continued to struggle, Mizuki attacking at every turn and Sesshomaru dodging and defending.

When he let out a whimper as his mother's paw collided with his face, Kagome's eyes widened. He was going to just let her beat him in exchange for what? To protect her? She couldn't allow it. Determined, she pulled herself into a standing position before closing her eyes; the tears falling without control now as she let go and slowly felt herself falling back. As the wind whipped around her body, she could see Sesshomaru turn to her, as if to question what was happening, only for Mizuki to take the opportunity to swipe at him again, hoping to stop him from stopping what would come next.

Kagome closed her eyes, bringing her hands up to cross over her chest as she fell. The fall itself was not frightening. She had fallen many times before and so the sensation it created was no longer terrifying, but actually peaceful. Still, she knew better than to think she might survive this. No one was there to catch her this time.

It didn't matter. If it meant Sesshomaru could live freely, without being attacked by his mother, then so be it. Her life was worth that. She could hear his cries even now, despite being unable to understand them – she could comprehend what he meant. He was angry with her, hurt by her, confused, and upset with the situation.  
When arms surrounded her, grasping onto her body and pulling against the gravitational pull of the Earth below, she opened her eyes and expected to see an angry Sesshomaru. Instead, she stared into the wide and surprised eyes of his mother, once again in her humanoid form. "You would give yourself for his sake?"

Kagome did not hesitate. "Of course."

Mizuki looked like she was going to be sick. Sesshomaru came towards them, returning to his own humanoid state as he glanced between the females, clearly worried that his mother might do something to Kagome. "Let her go." He demanded.

The inu female sighed and held the girl out to her son, who grasped her with such emotion that she knew for certain all was lost. He would never return to their pack. Sesshomaru had his own pack now, even if it had always been unconventional. Now, with the admittance of a clear intended – Mizuki could do nothing but stand by and watch. Part of her was grateful for Kagome's sign of loyalty. Perhaps, if the young girl could be so willing to give her life for Sesshomaru's safety, then she could somehow control her miko abilities and he would not be at risk. It was a lot to hope for, but it was all Mizuki had to cling to at this point. Swallowing down the burning sensation in her throat, the inu woman bowed and looked to the two – mere pups in her eyes – wishing with all her being that this was not a mistake. "This Mizuki concedes that your claim on our son is genuine, miko Kagome Higurashi."

With that, she turned away, slowly floating off as she tried to come to terms with the knowledge that she had lost her son – her _favorite_ son – to a human that could kill him with one touch. Confused at what had happened, Kagome watched the lady leave, turning to stare at Sesshomaru with a sorry expression. "What claim?"

Sesshomaru visibly deflated. Even he couldn't deny the heavy blow to his ego at those two simple words. In that moment, as his habits resurfaced and he tried to remind himself that she belonged to InuYasha and therefore, any claim on him was irrelevant, he realized the startling truth. She was no longer claimed. InuYasha had left her behind. At this point, she belonged only to him as his pack member. She belonged to _him_. That thought swelled within him and he determined that he had enough of pretending to be something he was not, of hiding from the possibilities of hurting his half-brother. She was here, she was free, and he wanted her. What else was there to consider?

His voice was rough as he pulled her closer, eliciting a lovely gasp from her as she stared up at him, still lost on what was happening. "This claim." Leaning in, he captured her lips with his. Unlike their previous kiss, this was more than just a request or a demand – it was a promise. He would keep her safe, cherish her every breath, and give her many pups. They would be happy, together. This he knew.

Kagome responded to his kiss at first, relishing in the moment as he showered her with his affections. His lips were rough on hers, his fang nipping at her lower lip as he continued to kiss her with all the pent up emotions he had been holding back. It was very clear that he wanted her, needed her. Yet, in the back of her mind she could not help but wonder if it was because he loved her – truly – or if it really was simply because she was part of his pack. Was this all instinct and nothing more? Could she accept that? Pushing against his chest, she broke their kiss and stared up at him, amazed at the swirling emotions that floated within the typically empty amber. "Sesshomaru… we need to talk."

He raised an eyebrow at that, not sure he enjoyed her tone. When he did not say anything after several uncomfortable minutes, she took it as a sign that she should start talking. Suddenly feeling nervous, she laughed and looked down over the Japanese countryside. They were still several hundred feet in the air. Not that it bothered her, it was a lovely view. She knew he wouldn't drop her. Tears welled in her eyes as she considered how to approach this. If he answered honestly and told her that it was instinct that drove him, that she was no more or less appealing than other females, her heart would be broken. If he answered honestly and told her that he loved her, that he wanted her above any other female, her heart would overflow. Either way, she would be shaken to her core, unable to process anything more.

Doubt began to seep into her mind. What if he said that it was instinct? It probably was. She wasn't all that fabulous. Compared to someone like Yukino, who had status, grace, and most of all an understanding of inu that would always exceed Kagome's… compared to that, she was nothing more than a momentary blip in time. For a short moment, she felt as if she would have been better off never having known what she did about him. This was crazy after all. She knew so much and yet felt like she knew absolutely nothing. Worse, what did he know about her?

"Why do you want me?" It was all she could manage to get out, even if it wasn't exactly what she wanted to say. The words came out forcefully, almost angrily, as if she was defensive about this. Perhaps she was.

Sesshomaru was shocked, staring down on her with his own confusion. It was a good question. It was _the_ question. Why did he want her? Was it just instinct?

Perhaps he had been naturally inclined to her because she was the first female who entered his pack? No. He knew better, even if he had been denying it this whole time. He had been interested in her from the beginning. That alone terrified him. He had no interest in humans, particularly human females. They had been nothing but trouble in his life, had done nothing but harm to him and his pack.

Still, that was not enough to deter his curiosity about the woman in question. First, she smelled _delicious_ - often one of the first hints towards a potential successful mating. A positive reaction towards the scent of a member of the opposite sex typically meant stronger offspring in the making. He could still recall his elder sisters babbling on about how amazing some male smelled after they would return from a hunt. It was one of the first signs that an inu was entering the stage of life where they would begin seeking a mate.

After her fragrance, he noted other features that were unusual about her but that intrigued him. Her eyes were a most peculiar shade, particularly for a human. Sesshomaru admitted that it had been an unfortunate realization as he moved to kill her for grasping his father's heirloom. That singular difference in her had been enough to throw him off for a few moments, just a few scant seconds, and he could still recall how he had berated himself for the embarrassing lapse in judgment.

Her clothing had also drawn his attention. The unusual textiles, the vibrant colors, the strange design – it had not even occurred to him at first how entirely indecent the outfit was until he had managed to steal a set from her belongings, his curiosity getting the better of him. After careful examination, he had discovered that the material was not quite like anything he had ever known before. All of his clothes were made from the finest silk, but these were made of something that was clearly an inferior product – plant based, he gathered from the scent – but was treated in such a way that it nearly rivaled his own clothing. Even more fascinating, the stitching was of such extreme precision, the likes of which he had never seen before. Youkai seamstresses were some of the best, having centuries of experience over their human counterparts, and even they could not create such tiny, neat rows of stitches. By the time he had finished his thorough exploration of the outfit, he was mortified to realize that he had wasted an entire afternoon on a human child's clothes. Embarrassment settled in and he was unable to bring himself to return the garment until recently.

Sesshomaru had not admitted to himself that he kept the clothes because they smelled of her and he quite enjoyed her scent. He even went so far as to hide them away, assuring none would find them by placing them amid his own pelts in his room. A few youkai had paused and sniffed the air before shrugging it off as their imagination as her scent dissipated in the halls, after that – none had ever known of his secret, his guilty pleasure.

Despite his fascination with the human woman, he continued to remind himself that she was human and humans were nothing but trouble. It had been a human woman who birthed InuYasha, only to deny Sesshomaru his rights as alpha and therefore stunt the hanyou's growth as an inu. After that, it had been a human woman who pinned InuYasha to a tree, forcing the hanyou to a fifty-year slumber that threw Sesshomaru's entire world upside down. Following that, another human female – the one that intrigued him so much – released the hanyou, only to leave for some time to some unexplainable location. When she returned, calling him "big brother" the endearment had irked him so badly for reasons he could not explain.

Kagome's return was both a blessing and a curse. In her short period of being away, he had convinced himself that she was irrelevant. Just a curiosity, nothing more… certainly nothing to lose sleep about – yet, when she came back and called to him so cheerfully, her scent rising to him with each gentle note of her voice, he had to struggle just to maintain his composure. She had not simply come back… she had returned as a fully-fledged woman. It was in that moment that Sesshomaru realized his guilty pleasure was now fatal attraction.

He could not have her. She belonged to InuYasha. That was an easy lie to accept. It would hurt the hanyou if he went against his claim on the female, so it was better to just let things go. Yet, everything in him wanted to take her for himself. She had proven so many qualities of the inu: strong parental instincts, courage in the face of conflict; she was even educated and rather intelligent for a female. All he had seen of her showed she had nearly everything he was seeking in a mate. The only thing she had not displayed was loyalty… and she had just shown that without a doubt. Why would he _not_ want her?

"Sesshomaru?"

The young lord blinked and returned her gaze, realizing he had not responded and had lost himself in thought. Kagome was waiting for his answer. Gripping her firmer, he pulled her to him, bringing a hand up to run through her hair as he tried to gather his thoughts. "You display all the qualities of a fine mate: mothering instincts, power, intelligence..."

Kagome frowned. Something felt off. This was still all part of his youkai instincts. Licking her lips, she swallowed down a thickness that had developed in her throat before interrupting him. "…but do you love me? I mean, you barely know me! Sure, you know all these little things that your instincts tell you are great about me, but what do you know about _me_? Where I come from, what my favorite food is, if I'm a morning person, if I am ticklish… you don't know anything about me at all! How can you want someone you don't even know?"

He stilled. Her heart stopped. That couldn't be a good sign. Closing her eyes tightly, she waited for the response she knew was going to come. When he leaned in, breath brushing against her ear hotly and sending a shiver down her spine, he said the words so surely, but so softly, that she almost thought she was dreaming. "I would like to think that I could take the next few decades of your life to get to know all of that… and more."

* * *

"Come on, Kagome!" Shippo called, racing ahead of her and Rin as he darted down the hillside towards the others. The woman laughed and followed, gripping the end of her kimono tightly as she went to enjoy the new spring flowers with the children of the village. Her face flushed, and she stopped to take a breath, the kitsune giving a sigh and turning to her with an exasperated look. "All the pretty flowers will be gone if you keep stopping, Kagome!" He teased.

She gave him a smirk and put her hands on her practically non-existent hips, trying not to lose her balance as she swayed there, plump with child. "Shippo! They are _all_ beautiful!"

The kitsune seemed disbelieving, plucking up a particularly lonely looking flower that only had a couple petals remaining and had clearly been squashed by someone already. "This one only looks pretty pathetic – not pretty looking." He said, matter-of-factly.

Kagome waddled over to him, taking the blossom and smiling down on it lovingly. "It's often the first flowers of spring, the brave ones that go out on their own and blaze a path for others, that are taken for granted. Without them, think of all we wouldn't have."

He still didn't seem to think she was making any sense. She took his hand with a small laugh before leading him up the next hill and on into the meadow, filled with flowers. When his eyes widened and he gasped at the awesome sight, she bent over and held the sad, wilted flower before him. "Do you see all of that, Shippo? All of that was thanks, in large part, to this flower right here."

The kitsune's eyes widened and he frowned as realization hit. "It did all of this… and I killed it!" He cried out in horror. Kagome laughed again, shaking her head, before tossing the poor abused flower in with the other blossoms.

"It will be reborn again… with the love and careful patience of the other flowers… and return the most beautiful of them all." Shippo looked up at her as if she was the most amazing person ever, possibly a magician, and Kagome smiled before gesturing to the flowers. The kitsune and Rin took their cue and darted out into the blossoms with the other children, enjoying them and knowing they were doing no harm. More would come. Love would bring them back together.

Kagome turned to look at the top of the neighboring hill, a gentle smile on her face as she watched the brothers interact. It was all so natural for them now, talking and standing beside one another as if it was nothing. She wondered what they were talking about, but her hearing wasn't able to pick up on their voices from this distance. With a sigh, she realized that was probably for the best. They were brothers, after all, and they deserved their private moments. It was what she had wanted for them all along.

Up on the hilltop stood two brothers.

They were as different as could be, but the same in many ways. Both had been hurt, lonely, afraid, confused, and wrong about each other. They had fought against each other, fought with the other, and fought against themselves because of the other. There was a time when they couldn't even hold a civil conversation that did not involve weaponry and danger. Yet, here they were, watching as the villagers took in their first taste of spring, speaking to one another as if they had never had a reason to do otherwise.

Neither had bothered to openly discuss what happened. It seemed difficult for both to bring up the subject. However, like usual, the elder brother's curiosity got the better of him and he could not help himself but to ask: "Why did you let her go?"

InuYasha scoffed, crossing his arms as his brow furrowed. He hated these kinds of mushy discussions. With a sigh, he looked to Sesshomaru, raising an eyebrow and letting out a huff. "You really are an idiot sometimes." Sesshomaru stood there silently, not responding to the insult as he waited for a legitimate answer to his question. The hanyou frowned and reached up, scratching at his chin before giving a shrug. "It just seemed to make sense. After all, she didn't love me… she loved my brother."

When he said those words, he turned to Sesshomaru, looking at him with wide eyes, as if waiting to be struck down for admitting their connection. It was the first time either had used such a title aloud, alone or otherwise. The elder inu stood there, mouth slightly open as he watched his pack member defer to him his proper status and for once in a very long time… Sesshomaru felt whole.

~*FIN*~


End file.
